Priyanka Todi: Moving on

Priyanka Todi is showing definite signs of dealing with the shock death of her husband and regaining a degree of normalcy. This was the observation of experts, who put her hour-long interaction with nine members of the state women’s commission under the scanner.

The commission that met Priyanka at her father’s Salt Lake residence on Tuesday afternoon found her “in a state of shock, but calm”.

She did not hide her grief at the loss of her husband, who she “loves and misses”, but made it clear that she would now prefer to live with her parents. This, said experts, showed that the 23-year-old girl was being practical.

“Under the circumstances, she is not sure about her future with Rizwanur’s family. So, it is natural and practical that she would stay with her parents,” said Ranadeep Ghosh Roy, the secretary of Indian Psychiatric Association.

The fact that Ashok Todi’s daughter agreed to meet members of the women’s commission —her first brush with the outside world since the CID recorded her statement after Rizwanur’s death — is being seen as a positive sign.

“The fact that she has met outsiders indicates that she has come out of acute grief reaction, which is common under such circumstances,” added Ghosh Roy.

Acute grief reaction is a state where people withdraw from the world around them after the death of a loved one. People suffering from this condition refuse to fight the trauma, shun social interaction and grieve alone.

“Priyanka seems to be picking up the pieces and slowly gearing up for the road ahead. She will probably not say a word against her family or the police now and just wait for the storm to blow over before starting afresh,” observed a psychologist.

“We have seen in some cases that people develop anxiety and phobia after the death of a dear one. But it appears from Tuesday’s interaction with nine strangers that Priyanka has not developed such post-traumatic stress disorder,” she added.

The fact that Priyanka told the women’s commission that she was keen to know the cause of Rizwanur’s death was not seen as a sign of defiance, but consistent with her present state of mind.

“She says she wants to know the truth, but it is no more than a passive urge. There is no sign of her wanting to pursue the truth beyond the four walls of a house that may have played an active part in driving her husband to his death. For Priyanka’s comment on wanting to know the truth to be taken seriously, she will have to emerge from that house and confront the outside world,” added a psychologist.

Priyanka has had no exposure to the outside world since the death of Rizwanur with her Salt Lake home, CG 235, being turned into a high-security address.

Priyanka told the women’s commission team that both she and Rizwanur were introverts and that she was too apprehensive about stepping out, given the media glare on the matter.

“The fact that she craves privacy and wants to step out of home in anonymity is understandable, but the manner of Rizwanur’s death and the public outrage will ensure that the matter is kept alive for a while. It will be interesting to see how long she keeps herself confined to the house or whether she tries to start afresh in another city,” said a psychologist.