What guys want. And what girls have to say about it! What do you look for in a girl? Tell t2@abp.in

A woman witha personality

A smart girl with a great personality is more attractive than the hot Mila Kunis-type with hay for brains. Now, we can almost see you rolling your eyes. Okay, so we take a bit of the blame — most guys don’t approach smart girls because 1) We stereotype them as being ‘not interested’ 2) We know a smart girl like you needs wooing and we’re not talking about the whistle-and-wink type!

She says: “Personality is important but let’s face it, looks matter a lot. In a bar, only if the girl looks pretty will he buy her a drink. Conversation follows.” — Tanisha Singh, 19

Kate Moss-like confidence

“Confidence is a must. It’s essential for anything, be it relationships or work,” says Mayank Majumdar, a student of DPS, Ruby Park. Kate Moss with her dishwater blonde hair and high cheekbones doesn’t exactly fit the prototype of the most gorgeous woman, but guess who is almost every guy’s fantasy? You’ve got to command attention because no one can look like Jessica Rabbit.

She says: “Agree. Guys go for girls with confidence and that’s okay because every girl should be confident not just to please guys but for herself.” — Gunjari Mukherjee, 19

A girl who doesn’t ‘friend-zone’

It’s really difficult to have a good date with someone whose hobbies include watching Keeping Up With The Kardashians and stalking strangers on Facebook. We also blame it on the girls. Why haven’t you met your soulmate yet? Well, maybe because you friend-zoned him!

She says: “Poppycock. Guys only want one thing and that’s the hottest chick. It doesn’t matter even if she’s a bimbo.” — Saloni Arora of St. Xavier’s College

Someone who shares the remote

It’s IPL and football season! Also, not ALL of us want to watch reruns of soaps that were famous in the ’80s. And no, we don’t want to cuddle NOW, we just want to watch the match. “When guys watch a football game, it’s all about the adrenaline. It’s quite irritating when constant text messages and stuff distract you. At that moment, nothing else matters but the game,” says Souradip Chatterjee, 19, from Asutosh College.

She says: “Hey, we love watching games too. However, that doesn’t mean you stop talking all day because ‘your team’ is playing a match! Sometimes, I wish my head were a football. I’d get more attention then!”

—       Tanisha

Grumpy Cat? No, please

You don’t have to be Friends’s Phoebe Buffay but a smile won’t hurt anybody. A grumpy-cat frown won’t get you any brownie points unless you’re looking for an undertaker. Eighteen-year-old Michael Varghese agrees: “An average girl who is positive is more appealing to a guy than a good-looking girl who’s always grumpy.”

She says: “Has someone given it a thought that a woman might be having one of those days when grumpy is all she can manage? We women, for a change, would like to meet a man who doesn’t think of scoring when he meets us and can indulge in a nice conversation without making the whole love thing a basketball game.” — Mohona Banerjee, a resident of Ballygunge

Shop less!

A major complaint with almost all guys who go shopping with their gals is that the “You look good in everything” compliment is swiftly met by a “You’re not paying attention!” The thing is he can’t comment on that ugly dress you’re trying on because 1) He has no clue that it’s ugly and

2) He values his life and will not suggest the above even at gunpoint. Also, do you really expect him to know the difference between a Jimmy Choo and a Manolo? Remember how you thought it was ‘Fergie’ from The Black Eyed Peas (instead of Sir Alex Ferguson) who was retiring?

She says: “Oh, it wasn’t Fergie from Black Eyed Peas, then? Just kidding. Well, you can’t blame us! Shopping isn’t boring and we don’t really take that long.” — Shalini Chakraborty, 19

A girl who makes an effort to dress pretty

Now before you judge and say ‘gotcha’, let us explain. It doesn’t necessarily mean a body that looks like it came off an anime comic meant for adults. Just that a little effort goes a long way in showing how committed you are and guys like to show off their well-dressed dates (just like girls do).

She says: “Honestly speaking, men like girls with a nice ass but that lust lasts a week, maybe two. In the end, however, a guy will date a girl for her mind, not her body.” — Nishi Dugar, second-year student at St. Xavier’s College

A chick who’s understanding

We all need somebody who can be a shoulder to cry on. Now usually, we would turn to our bros but what if you could turn to your girlfriend instead? Guys want to be “manly” but hey, even the toughest guys need a break sometimes.

She says: “We would love it if guys took a break from being all manly and caveman. We girls kind of like it when they open up to us rather than holing up with their friends. For a change, we would like to wipe your nose.” — Mohona

Surprise, surprise!

Everyone loves surprises. Take a cue from queen Cleopatra. Someone asked permission to meet the great Julius Caesar and the monarch agreed. He arrived carrying a rolled-up carpet on his shoulders and on unfurling it, Cleopatra sprang out, capturing Caesar’s heart forever. Now, there’s no need to ask your mother where your carpets are kept. All we’re saying is that if you expect your Romeo to surprise you with songs and roses, you should extend the same courtesy.

Not roses, though!

She says: “Everyone loves surprises. But the reason we don’t sing for them and all is because traditionally they did all the singing and we did the swooning, you know? It’s like it’s drilled into our heads.” — Taniya Banerjee, 20

An honest girl Most men agree that if only their exes had been honest, they would have forgiven and forgotten. “Of course, an individual is entitled to a few secrets that he can take to the grave... but beyond that, every bit of themselves they can honestly disclose makes the relationship stronger,” feels Aryan Roy, final-year student of La Martinere for Boys.

She says: “Honesty is important but so is one’s personal space. As long as the secret has nothing to do with the relationship, I don’t see any reason to play Gossip Girl.” — Taniya

10 DIGITAL DATING RULES

That all girls must know If she’s looking for a serious thing and not a fling

Rule #1 All men have a type. Look at Leonardo DiCaprio’s ex girlfriends — Blake Lively, Gisele Bundscen, Bar Rafaeli… they are all willowy blondes. The point? It’s a waste of time to chase guys if you’re not their ‘type’, no matter how wonderful you look!

Rule #2 You can’t choose frump over fashion in the social scene. Dress well, feel good. Men will notice you.

Rule #3 Don’t talk or text a guy FIRST. If a guy is interested in you, he will talk or text you first. It may sound crazy but “if he eventually ends the relationship, it’s because you made the first move”, says The New Rules.

Rule #4 Like it or not, after a date, you will have to wait for a guy to reach out and ask you again. You cannot remind him that you exist. If you do, you will prolong a relationship that may actually be over.

Rule #5 Wait for at least four hours to answer a guy’s first text and a minimum of 30 minutes thereafter. A little bell may go off in your head, bringing a sense of urgency to answer it but hang on! For a guy, a text message is as fun as a video game — and he’ll probably do it while he’s doing five other things. But for a girl, it’s like winning the lottery. It’s all she can think about for many hours!

Rule #6 All texts, especially the first one from a new guy, should be responded to with fewer words than he wrote. Example, he writes: “Hey, what’s up? Wanna go out sometime?” You reply: “Sure, sounds like fun!” NOT: “Sure, sounds like fun. Work is kind of crazy but I’m free on Thursday night and I know this really cool place.” When you write more, you become the pursuer not the pursued.

Rule #7 End a conversation first. Why? So you don’t talk too much and do leave him wanting more!

Rule #8 Don’t be an open book on Facebook — keep things mysterious. Never friend a guy on FB first. Wait one or two days before accepting his request. And rarely write on his wall (that includes liking and tagging!).

Rule #9 Wait for a guy to follow you on Twitter first and rarely return tweets. Also, avoid tweeting every five minutes.

Rule #10 Once you start dating, don’t hang out with him 24x7. Most guys come on strong in the beginning but if you agree to see them everyday, they will eventually get bored.

Rule #11 In a long-distance relationship, let him visit you more. If a guy is crazy about you, he will visit you! If he’s making excuses, it’s a fantasy relationship.

Rule #12 Don’t accept booty calls or meaningless hook-ups. If he really likes you, he’ll make a plan during the day and not call you at 2am asking if you wanna meet.

Finally, if you have to figure out ways to make a guy be with you, the relationship won’t hold up long-term. So look for the signs, follow the rules and let us know how it goes! You know where to reach us — t2@abp.in

— This is t2’s take on Ellen Fein & Sherrie Schneider’s The New Rules: The dating dos and don’ts for the digital generation

Text: Mayukh Majumdar