My Fair Lady

Hollywood: She might need to work on that Cockney accent to get the Eliza Doolittle lingo right, but Salma is our chosen one to take over from Audrey Hepburn in My Fair Lady. She might not look as petite as Audrey, but this earthy Latina hottie sure knows how to walk the walk and talk the talk needed to capture Eliza’s rustic charm. Having gone through the experience of starting her career with an affected English accent that had to be corrected, Salma would also know how to explore Eliza’s emotional journey. And which man wouldn’t secretly fantasise about sexy Salma fetching his, er, shoes?

Teaching Salma how to roll her tongue right would be Jack Nicholson. A far better actor than Rex Harrison ever was, Big Jack would bring rare power to the portrayal of the short-tempered phonetics teacher obsessed with transforming a crude flower girl into a real lady. Combining As Good as It Gets and Anger Management, Nicholson will create a whole new — and even more arresting — Professor Henry Higgins.

Bollywood: She can kill with a smile, she can wound with her eyes... She hides like a child but she’s finally a woman to Higgins. Yes, in Kajol we trust to bring Eliza Doolittle alive in a Bolly remake of My Fair Lady. Having won a million hearts with her acts ranging from Kuch Kuch Hota Hai to U Me Aur Hum, this dusky beauty knows how to blend laughter with silent tears and spunk with sensitivity. She will blossom as the grimy flower girl off the street and then bloom as the gorgeous lady at the Embassy Ball.

And who better to play Pygmalion than good ol’ Amitabh Bachchan? Taking bits and pieces from Black, Mohabbatein, KANK and Cheeni Kum, Bachchan will be an elderly but endearing Professor Enry Iggins. The wonderful teacher-student relationship in My Fair Lady should enable the Big B to bury the dirty ol’ man image that he has had since Nishabd and Aag.

Mary Poppins

Hollywood: With that twinkle in her eyes and an impish smile, Nicole Kidman who played the kind and gentle witch with supernatural powers in Bewitched could be today’s Mary Poppins. It isn’t hard to imagine Nicole the magic nanny descending from the clouds with her bottomless carpetbag just the way she had wafted down perched on a broomstick in Bewitched. And just like Julie Andrews, our modern-day Mary Poppins can use her vocal chords to good effect. After singing her way through Moulin Rouge and Birthday Girl, Nicole Kidman would sing her way into the dysfunctional Banks family to set things right.

Bollywood: She’ll probably have to lip sync her songs in the Hindi remake of this Disney classic but Preity Zinta with a mischievous glint in her eyes and her dimpled smile could happily slip into the garb of the smart and playful Mary Poppins. With her spoonful of sugary charm it would be fun to see her dancing around with penguins (not Yuvi) or riding the merry-go-round (not sitting in the dugout) and making this singsong delight a supercalifragilisticexpialidocious success.

Sound of Music

Hollywood: She is funny, warm and cute enough to be the next Maria Rainer. So who better than Drew Barrymore to be the Do Re Mi nun who wants to break free and turns governess for the von Trapp family — though there is no evidence that she can sing, or even really act. Children can be a tough audience to please but Drew should have no problems there, having bagged Nickelodeon’s Kid’s Choice Award a few years ago. With that infectious smile in place and some Music and Lyrics to go with it, it wouldn’t take long for Drew to solve the problem of being Maria.

Bollywood: She is someone who can charm kids (and their fathers) with effortless ease. She did that in Ta Ra Rum Pum, on Kya Aap Paanchvi Pass Se Tez Hain? and is set to do that again in Thoda Pyar Thoda Magic. So, Rani Mukerji is our pick to play Maria. She will be a convincing rebel among nuns, friend to the children, lover to Captain von Trapp, and our ‘favourite thing’ about the film.

Roman Holiday

Hollywood: With all the royal attention that she gets after being voted one of the sexiest women in the world, several times over, stepping into Princess Anne’s shoes in Roman Holiday should come easy to this “Spanish enchantress”. For Penelope Cruz, who once donated her entire paycheque to Mother Teresa’s Missionaries of Charity, starring as a noble princess ready to romance an ordinary guy, give up her riches and lead a common life should be a breeze. Tom Cruise could try doing a Gregory Peck (though we doubt he can match that walk at the end) as Joe Bradley the reporter. Cruz and Cruise had sizzled under the Vanilla Sky and now they have a chance to romance on the streets of Rome in one of the most heart-warming tales of loving and losing ever told on celluloid.

Bollywood: There’s something about Katrina Kaif. This half-Brit, half-Indian’s stunning looks coupled with that innocent, slightly whimsical charm make Katrina our desi pick to be Princess Anne. She can flee her palace and waltz the streets of Rome with no qualms about stepping into life more — or maybe less — ordinary. Akshay Kumar as the laconic reporter will teach the free-spirited delicate darling a thing or three about love and life. They have already played the princess-and-the-pauper act to perfection (though more Notting Hill style) in Namastey London. Now, Namastey Rome, anyone?

Gone With The Wind

Hollywood: Just like Scarlett ’Hara, the lanky Keira Knightly may not be beautiful in the conventional sense but is young and vivacious enough to play a sweet 16 like Vivian Leigh did in 1939. The swashbuckling heroine of Pirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End should be able to deal with life during one of the most turbulent periods in American history when this epic tale of love and life is played out. Having seen her as the strong-willed and witty yet flawed Elizabeth Bennett in Pride and Prejudice, it isn’t hard to imagine Keira as Scarlett, intelligent but vain. We only hope she keeps that smile in check: she showed too many teeth and undid her version of Elizabeth Bennett, and we are certain her wide-lipped grin isn’t befitting a Southern belle.

And there’s only one man who can be Rhett Butler — George Clooney himself. He has Rhett’s good looks, that older-wiser charm and that undefinable edge to play the man who is every woman’s (slightly twisted) dream. And something tells us he will say “Frankly, my dear, I don’t give a damn” better than anyone ever did (sorry Clark Gable) or ever will.

Bollywood: This pretty young thing exudes that childlike charm to play Scarlett’s young and innocent days on the war torn streets. Scarlett lives her life rationally and looks for success just like Ayesha Takia did as John Abraham’s solicitous wife in No Smoking. It shouldn’t be hard for this bubbly young actress to switch from a spoilt teenager to a hard-working widow and a shrewd opportunist, given her depth in Dor and her intensity in No Smoking.

Going by him at his intense best — from Zakhm to Omkara, Hum Dil De Chuke Sanam to Gangaajal — we opt for Ajay Devgan. He must not try and do it like Clark Gable did, but make Rhett Butler his own with a smouldering yet sardonic intensity.

Can you add to/change this list? Tell t2@abpmail.om