Allusions, homages, references, nods, quotations… Sujoy Ghosh’s Aladin is such a borrowed product that you wonder what it takes to conjure up a little bit of imagination. Certainly not Rs 50 crore, not the best visual effects supervisor in the world, not the biggest superstar in Bollywood. No matter what these GeNext directors have at their disposal, they end up making one Drona after another.

Sujoy is clearly too much in love with the movies. But he is so much in love with them that here he forgets to make one on his own. He really gives the world ‘remix’ a whole new meaning. He takes an Arabian Nights tale, drags other tales (Marjina, Kasim, what not) and then adds Bollywood’s jhankaar beats.

There’s ‘agar ladki palat ti hai, toh woh tumse pyaar karti hai’ from DDLJ, there’s the Padosan sequence where the genie sings for Aladin from behind the pillars and there’s that shocker of a pelvic thrust to Chura ke dil mera. It really is a strange world, this Khwaish town.

You are promised a fantastical fight between good and evil, but even that one single wish isn’t granted. Aladin is actually a lousy college love story with a lame backstory in the end of parents being killed and little boy being the chosen one to kill the evil lord. Got the Hogwarts drift?

But hello, weren’t we told it is an Amitabh Bachchan film?

Amitabh Bachchan, who is called Genius in the film (something Aladin and the villain Ring Master will remind you every two minutes), shows you the entire sweep of his dramatics in this one act. And sorry Mr Bachchan, we do not mean it in a nice way. His performance is as uneven as his hairstyle, er his wig, ranging from terrific to terrible, irresistible to irritating. You would love him when he is having fun, doing an impromptu alaap, mouthing gibberish and just being plain silly. The moment of the movie is when he speaks to Aladin Chatterjee in Bengali: “Bujhle? Esho baba!” But all those cheap thrills are short-lived. The moment he switches to serious mode, he hams it up big time. You can be theatrical as the Last Lear, but not every film set is a stage, Sir!

In hindsight, it is Sanjay Leela Bhansali who did more bad than good to actor AB by painting him Black. Every film, ever since, Bachchan just repeats his Devraj Sahai act — trying to chomp every word like it’s the last one he will ever spit out. Ring Master isn’t joking when he tells him: “Aur do char bhashan de aur main bore hoke mar jaoonga!”

Also, Sujoy doesn’t know what he wants to do with Bachchan. Just as he murders the soundtrack by having Vishal-Shekhar compose songs that have a similar rhythm to Bachchan’s past hits, he tries to make the Big B do everything in 135 minutes. From that shake of the head, the run across the turf, the familiar dance steps, AB is made to play AB and, honestly, he used to do it so much better before.

There’s really nobody else to talk about in this film. Riteish is almost invisible as Aladin. He is as big a loser in frame one as he is in the final frame. In that way, he sure is in character of the boy who is bullied throughout his life for being called Aladin.

Sanjay Dutt’s is more of an extended special appearance. You don’t fear him, an absolute must even if you want to cater to just kids. Jacqueline ‘Miss Sri Lanka’ Fernandez is easy on the eye but unfortunately all she is asked to do is smile whenever the camera is turned on her.

The visual effects supervised by Charles Darby, the man who did the matte paintings for Matrix and the Harry Potter films, is good only when they try something new. Like Genius appearing in a maze of words on the restaurant menu card is fun as is the wrapping of the frog’s mouth with a red ribbon. The rest you have seen before. Sabu Cyril’s art direction and Sirsha Ray’s cinematography work in harmony with the visual effects.

Ironically, it was Sukumar Roy’s birthday on Friday, the day Aladin got released. No crores, no special effects, no Amitabh Bachchan, he needed just a few words to transport you into the realm of pure fantasy. And his son needed just a few high-fives to conjure up the magic. All they had was a little imagination.

A big word of caution to parents. Do not take your children to watch this Aladin. They deserve the original, the extra ‘d’ in the title, or else they would hear the ghosts singing Dardi rab rab kar di every time the lamp is rubbed.

Pratim D. Gupta
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