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| Target India: Andrew Strauss |
India to face new battle of Britain
Manmohan Singh revealed he took his BlackBerry to bed with him so he could follow the final exciting stages of the India-South Africa Test.
I jest — he didn’t.
But the British Prime Minister David Cameron, who was following the England-Australia Ashes war in Melbourne, admitted he “went to bed with my BlackBerry so I could keep up on the score. The guys have given everyone at home something to celebrate this Christmas. I look forward to welcoming the (players) to 10, Downing Street.”
Even British immigrants who have lived down under for 40 years emerged from the woodwork to celebrate England’s first Ashes triumph on Australian soil for 24 years. They were not constrained by the “Tebbit test” decreed by the Tory politician Norman (now Lord) Tebbit in 1990. This urged Indian and Pakistani immigrants in England to support their country of adoption against their country of origin.
But when India tours England this summer, most Indians in this country will still happily fail the Tebbit test. But India had better start preparing for the England tour in good time for their opponents will unleash a new generation of giant fast bowlers in helpful English conditions.
Many former England players are already gloating.
“There is no reason why we cannot be the No. 1 Test team,” declared former skipper Michael Vaughan. “India are a good side but we can catch them because we have depth.”
Darren Gough concurred: “We’re the best team in the world at this moment. I’ve watched the South Africa-India series and I see nothing to worry about. India is fantastic in their own country and have some great individuals, but I’d fancy this England side to beat them every day of the week.”
I read a cocky blog by one Mahanda Patel of Delhi: “The English only won because the Aussies were truly dire so don’t gloat too much. Come and play India and then get back to me!”
But the England captain, Andrew Strauss, thorough gentleman though he is, is not to be underestimated.
“English cricket is not just about winning the Ashes,” he reflected after retaining the Ashes. “We’ve got to look forward to the future and get the team up the rankings — to number one at some stage, we hope. That’s the ultimate goal, and India next summer is an important step on that way.”
As always, I shall back the losers.
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| Yorkshire pride: Castle Howard. Courtesy VisitBritain |
Boycott’s Britain
The phrase, “God’s own country”, is used by tourist organisations all over the world — one in Kerala, for example — to plug their own particular patches.
I am tempted to use it to describe Yorkshire, England’s largest county, which is still largely off the beaten track for the majority of visitors from India.
My estimate is that, fuelled by prosperity, the annual number of visitors from India is now edging towards the million mark. And VisitBritain, the body charged with promoting tourism to the UK, says it is expecting 1,00,000 extra visitors from India in 2011 because of the publicity generated by Prince William’s wedding to Kate Middleton on April 29.
“Britain’s Monarchy is a crucial part of the appeal this country offers as a tourism destination,” confirms Sandie Dawe, chief executive of VisitBritain.
Now is a good time to book, incidentally.
There is historic York, with York Minister, the cathedral where Shekhar Kapur shot Elizabeth; Castle Howard, one of the grandest stately homes in England where the TV adaptation of Evelyn Waugh’s Brideshead Revisited was filmed; and, of course, the Yorkshire Moors where on stormy nights you can imagine Heathcliff calling out to his Cathy (it’s a good idea to read — or reread — Wuthering Heights before coming).
Emily Bronte’s home, the Parsonage in the Yorkshire village of Haworth, is worth a pilgrimage, as is Gordale Scar, a dramatic limestone ravine in nearby Malham with two waterfalls and overhanging limestone cliffs over 100 metres high.
Once you have been to Yorkshire, you learn to take a more indulgent view of Geoffrey Boycott and his grandmother, who can apparently bat better than most Australians.
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Christmas murder
There is always a murder on television during the Christmas and the New Year period, often another gripping case for Hercule Poirot or Miss Marple.
This year, tragically, there has been a real one.
The victim is a pretty woman, Joanna Yeates, 25, a landscape artist in Bristol, who left a pub at 8pm on December 17 after a drink with colleagues. CCTV footage showed her buying a pizza and a bottle of cider during her walk home to her basement flat a mile away. Joanna was reported missing two days later when her boyfriend, Greg Reardon, 27, returned from a trip to Sheffield. But Joanna’s coat, keys and mobile phone were still in the flat.
On Christmas morning, a couple walking their dog along a country lane three miles away chanced upon a frozen body. Joanna’s distraught parents David, 63, and Theresa, 58, identified their daughter. She had been strangled.
But by whom?
As is routine with British police, both Joanna’s flat and the location where her body was found were sealed off to allow forensic officers in protective white clothing to conduct microscopic searches.
And this is what we need in India, where normally we get policemen in big boots stomping all over a crime scene.
Forensic science still seems in its infancy in India. With terrorism on the increase this is an area which needs urgent attention. This is also a field in which women scientists can excel.
In Bristol, meanwhile, Joanna’s live-in landlord, Chris Jefferies, 65, a retired schoolteacher who was once head of English at the local public school, Clifton College, is being questioned about the murder.
CCTV is also important for Indian cities. My guess is that police, having examined CCTV footage at Clifton Bridge — the only route from Joanna’s flat to where her body was found — have identified a suspect car.
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Merlin magic
A little learning may be a dangerous thing but I am glad that back at St Xavier’s School in Patna so many years ago, Father Cleary took us for Tennyson’s poem, Morte D’Arthur.
There are bits I still haven’t forgotten such as the grievously wounded King recalling the prediction that had been made by the court magician at Camelot: “Tho’ Merlin sware that I should come again/ To rule once more — but let what will be, be…”
It so happens that among several new stamps that will be issued by Royal Mail in March 2011 — British stamps are now among the most imaginative in the world — is one costing 60 pence dedicated to Merlin.
On behalf of all of us who were lucky enough to have been taught by Fr Cleary, it is worth dedicating the Merlin stamp to his memory. I know he would want all children in India to be acquainted with the magic of poetry.
Tittle tattle
The new year will bring an exciting addition to the Indian inmates at Madame Tussauds in London. However, Hrithik Roshan must take care he is not outshone when he stands next to his waxwork model on January 20 — as happened in the past with the unsmiling Narasimha Rao.
