Salman Khan: ‘I’m a virgin’

In his Koffee with Karan debut, Salman Khan kicked off Season 4 with a bang, sipping on his coffee and then letting off some steam. Tongue firmly in cheek, Salman let a few slip out — virginity to aborted marriage plans — and spilled the beans on the hush-hush affair between former flame Katrina Kaif and Ranbir Kapoor.

Talking points Marriage: I tell people not to look for a relationship or commitment from me now. Salman the actor: If I had to start now, I wouldn’t get a job even on TV. Shah Rukh Khan: I am 100 per cent sure we can never be best of friends again, but there’s lot of respect that I have and I have loved him over the years.

revelations The Ranbir-Katrina hook-up (“Ranbir’s taking away everything, yaar. It’s not fair”. His advice to Ranbir: “Have fun”... his advice to Kat: “Make sure he doesn’t have fun!”). Near-marriage to Sangeeta Bijlani (“Even the wedding cards were printed!”). Sleeping alone (“It’s damn good to sleep alone! You can sleep any way you want to.”). Salman the virgin (“I am going to save myself for the woman I get married to”).

catty comments All directed at Ran-Kat. On their leaked Ibiza pictures: “Ranbir didn’t do that?!” (Poker face). On waking up as Ranbir: “Salman lucky hai ya main?” On waking up as Katrina: (Shows as if she’s waking up from sleep) “Where’s Ranbir?” Hint of a possible Hrithik-Kat connection in his advice to Hrithik (“You stay out of this”). t2 takeaway: The best Koffee episode. Ever.

Kareena Kapoor: ‘my sister-in-law Katrina’

The week after the Salman-style expose, Ranbir Kapoor found himself sharing the couch with cousin Kareena. Over the next hour, he went red in the face as Kareena said loud and clear what Salman had hinted at — that Ranbir-Katrina are an item.

Talking points Kareena made sure it was Kat, Kat and Kat: “I hope I get to dance to Chikni Chameli and Sheila ki jawani at Ranbir and Katrina’s wedding... only Katrina songs.” When asked who she would want to have a gay encounter with, Bebo didn’t bat an eyelid: “With my sister-in-law Katrina Kaif!”

revelations Ranbir wants to get married “hopefully soon”. Said he’s in a “bit happy, bit settled and centred place” personally; Kareena is the “information ministry” of the industry (read: “gossip-monger”); Ranbir thinks that Katrina is “very beautiful”.

catty commentS When asked what the last dialled number on her ex Shahid Kapoor’s phone would be, Kareena said: “I can’t imagine a situation in which his phone would be in my hand”. Ouch! On letting go of a host of films that have become blockbusters, Kareena quipped: “I am the only actress who can boast of giving films to other actresses.”

t2 takeaway: Kareena the ‘Kat’ really took

Ranbir’s trip.

Aamir Khan: ‘Salman’s a genuine friend’

Like buddy Salman, Aamir — with wife Kiran Rao — made his debut on Koffee with Karan, offering us a peek into much more than we have ever known of the man.

Talking points Films, friends and family. On friend Salman Khan: “He’s a wonderful guy… so generous,” said Aamir who “didn’t like” Salman when they worked on Andaz Apna Apna two decades ago. “I found him rude and inconsiderate. After Andaz Apna Apna, I felt I wanted to stay away from this guy, but now he’s a genuine friend.”

On his vibe with Shah Rukh Khan: “There’s a genuine regard and respect for each other’s work... there’s also a certain amount of guardedness.”

revelations Aamir doesn’t go to trial shows of films because he has often hurt people with his honest feedback. He is insecure and asks Kiran “at least once a month” whether she’s leaving him. Aamir doesn’t attend parties often because he’s “allergic to loud music”. He finds Kangana Ranaut “very sexy”.

t2 takeaway: Aamir was, er, being human!

Priyanka Chopra: ‘Shahid Kapoor is gandi baat ’

Bollywood’s new BFFs Priyanka Chopra and Deepika Padukone shared the couch. While PC was bindaas and brazen, DP played it safe.

Talking points Priyanka on her kind of man: “I want to be insecure about my guy. If I am not insecure about him, it means I don’t want him enough”. Deepika on former boyfriend Ranbir: “That relationship became my world. That relationship really taught me a lot, when it ended.” PC on dealing with heartbreak: “I hate heartbreaks! I can’t deal with them… I become a zombie.”

revelations PC spoke about former beau Shahid for the first time (”It’s all cool… we are in the same industry. I am fine… with him”); DP on how she deals with indecent proposals (“I just smile… a dumb smile like I haven’t understood what they mean”); DP on her ‘RK’ tattoo (“It should come off sometime soon”). And hey, PC thinks Sonakshi Sinha has “masala hips”!

catty commentS PC on Shahid: “Gandi baat!” Deepika on an alternative career for Kareena: “She should start a charity… (Since Kareena had claimed that by refusing Ram-Leela she had given it in “charity” to Deepika). PC on Vidya Balan walking away with all the awards for Kahaani: “My performance in Barfi! was more nuanced and different.”

t2 takeaway: (These) Girls just wanna have fun. And so did we!

FreIda means ‘little penis’, Nargis means ‘butt cheeks’

The season’s sauciest episode had Freida Pinto and Nargis Fakhri get down and dirty — talking on everything from threesomes to striptease. So much so that the episode had to be aired at 11pm instead of the usual 9pm.

Talking points On what their names mean: “When you say Nargis a little too fast sometimes, it sounds as ‘Nargas’ which means ‘butt cheeks’! So I have often introduced myself as Butt Cheeks; Freida: “My name in Portuguese or Brazilian, I don’t remember which, means ‘little penis’!” On needing boobs to survive in Bollywood: Nargis said boobs were a necessity to make it as a heroine in Bollywood and Freida insitinctively responded with that was why she could never make it here. Their solution? “Slip-on silicon boobs!”

revelations Nargis is a lot of fun: “Despite being all sexy and stuff, I’m actually kind of goofy, I tell a lot of dirty jokes so yes, I’m kind of vulgar, and I’m saving up to buy a farm in New Zealand”; Freida is “willing to marry anybody who is not looking for a fair, light-eyed virgin”; Nargis is seeing Uday Chopra: “I would kill to see Ranbir and John hook up, and would marry Uday!”

catty commentS KJo: Which item song would you do and why… Sheila ki jawaani, Munni badnaam, Fevicol or Chikni Chameli? Freida:You know, since I’ve taken Ranbir’s name, let’s just start a catfight… Sheila ki jawaani!

t2 takeaway: The most unabashed and unpretentious chat this season.

Anushka Sharma: ‘Virat Kohli is my favourite cricketer’

Her disastrous lip job may have been the big talking point — she even tweeted a denial after the episode — but Anushka Sharma revealed a lot more, her Bombay Velvet director Anurag Kashyap for company, on the couch — and it had a lot to do with a certain Virat Kohli. From constant cricket talk to innuendoes galore, it was Virat all the way.

Talking points Karan poked and prodded, but all that Anushka said about rumoured beau Virat Kohli was that he was her favourite cricketer. However, the slip-up came a few moments later when she blurted: “We’ll see where it (the relationship) goes.” Anurag on his separation from wife Kalki Koechlin: “Right now we are going through a separation and we are figuring things out for ourselves. I’ve been madly in love with her.”

revelations Anushka doesn’t count Deepika as a friend: “I don’t think she’s a friend… she’s not an enemy, though. Friend is a very big thing”. When asked who she would go out on a date with, Anushka chose Virat over former boyfriends Ranveer Singh and Arjun Kapoor.

catty comments If Anushka woke up one morning as Deepika: “I would say my morning prayer…. Ram Ram Ram Ram Ram”. One piece of advice Anurag would give Kareena: “Next time you should not ask who is in the film… you should ask what is the film!”

t2 takeaway: Anushka is definitely seeing Virat! And the lip job? Our lips are sealed.

Sonam Kapoor: ‘if you aren’t good-looking, they think you are a good actor’

Even though she was accompanied by dad Anil Kapoor, Sonam shot from the lip, criticising her contemporaries on their style sense and acting abilities.

Talking points Sonam the style icon: “I am considered an icon at the age of 20 when people like after 40s or after they die are considered icons. It’s just amazing!”

Sonam on not being considered a good-enough actress “People make so-called art films, why do you have to take like not nice-looking people, like why? Doesn’t make sense and just that they don’t look good does not mean they are good actors.”

revelations Anil is “petrified” of wife Sunita; Anil has ‘tutored’ Sonam to say all guys are her “good friends”; One person who shouldn’t think of dating Sonam? Ranbir Kapoor, was the quick-as-a-whip reply from Anil.

catty comments Sonam’s style advice to Parineeti Chopra: “Don’t wear such tight clothes, man!”; Sonam on Deepika: “She doesn’t have her own style... (she’s a) good girl gone bad!” Anil on waking up as Shah Rukh: “I would want to be Salman Khan!”

t2 takeaway: Sonam talks too much!