This is not for the nay-sayers who say the best way to deal with the Pujas is by staying home.

We say, the pandals are meant to be seen, not glanced at from a distance.

We say, unless you get down to the basics — from the ritual to the revelry — you will never drown in the true spirit of the pujas.

Here’s the Metro guide to understanding and enjoying Saptami 2008:

What is Saptami about?

The most important ritual of Saptami is the bathing of the nabapatrika, a collection of nine plants, which represents Durga as a goddess of vegetation. The bathing should take place preferably in the Ganga.

The nabapatrika prabesh (the placing of the nabapatrika beside Ganesha) and the day-specific puja including mahasnan (the bathing of a mirror that is reflecting the Devi) have to be performed by 9.27am.

Environment is a major theme in the rituals and not just in the pandals.

Who is Kolabou then?

Nabapatrika is Kolabou. Since the plantain (kola) leaf is most visible, and the patrika is draped in a sari and is placed next to Ganesha, it is mistaken for his drooping, docile, faceless wife, somewhat of an outsider in the close-knit divine family unit. But looks are deceptive.

Is it going to rain today?

The goddess has arrived on the elephant this year and the Met office, the paanji and the priest are unanimous that it will rain. Scattered thundershowers are likely.

Carry umbrellas and a pair of floaters in your smart bag (to be kept in the car and not taken to the pandal). Remember, the Maddox Square grounds turn into pure slush when it rains.

How do you use the Metro today?

The Metro will be crowded. But try to wait in the middle compartments as they tend to be comparatively less crowded. Also, brace for the whoosh when the train enters the platform if you don’t want your hair to be all messed up and your skirt to do a Marilyn Monroe.

Today, the trains will run between 2pm and midnight at 10-15 minutes interval.

What is the one spirited chore for the day?

Stocking up on liquor. On Ashtami, the shops open at 2pm. On Dashami, they shut at 4pm.

What is the fashion advice for the day?

Skirts for her, jackets for him as east meets west

What is a word we bet you cannot avoid uttering at a pandal today?

“Tata”.