Gen Z loves its freedom, or so they say.

But freedom comes at a price, many young Calcuttans who moved abroad right after school have learnt.

Many students in the US said the grass is not always greener on the other side. Instagram stories tell only half the story. Metro spoke to several young Calcuttans about life thousands of miles away from home.

Living alone

The difference between living with family in Calcutta and living alone in the US is not always dramatic,
but it is telling, said a psychology student at New York University.

In Calcutta, comfort is woven into everyday life. “You don’t have to worry about food and a driver may be available. Mothers notice if something is wrong, and grandmothers ask if you’ve eaten,” she said.

Abroad, those comforts disappear. “The first time I felt like I was on my own was when I had to navigate the subway,” said Samaira Jain, a student in New York.

Freedom’s price

The freedom many enjoy most is “not having to be liable to an authority” at home. Late nights or sleepovers no longer need explanations. “I can come and go whenever I want,” said Samaira.

But freedom also means learning everyday skills. “In New York, getting from one place to another means learning routes, timings and train transfers. It is like learning an everyday skill,” said Ranveer Ghoshal, a business student at New York University.

Counting dollars

Many quickly learn to be frugal. Every expense matters, whether to walk home with groceries or book a cab.

“If I don’t feel like eating what is cooked at home, I order something online. But saving that $20 becomes significant when I’m in the US,” said Shreyans Tibrawalla, who is studying chemical engineering at the University of Minnesota.

Teachers who remain in touch with former students said the experience teaches them to balance wants with needs. “Our students talk about learning to live with what is available. They learn to balance between what they want to eat and what they would eat through the week,” said Tina Servaia, senior school principal of Calcutta International School.

Missing home

For many, the distance feels greatest during family gatherings and festivals.

“During major events back home, I miss my family most,” said Nandini Agarwal, who studies at Boston University. This side of life rarely appears online. “Instagram shows college campuses, the city, friends and freedom, but it doesn’t show the moment when a student is sick, alone and living on soup, or homesick during Puja,” she said.

Growing up

The first undergraduate year often allows one or even two trips home.

“The next year, they have internships or jobs on the side, and there is no coming back. If you are concerned about your grades, you have to stay put,” said Seema Sapru, principal of The Heritage School.

Teachers said the dependence on home gradually fades. “When they come back in the first year, they visit school often because they are looking for that comfort zone. Gradually, they are more confident, and they visit school not for comfort but to network and touch base,” said Servaia.

On your own

Another adjustment is academic life.

“Many of them tell us that it is a shock for them to realise that nobody really cares about them over there. Whether they have understood their class or not, whether they have woken up and gone to class on time, whether they have submitted their assignments. The professors don’t mother or mollycoddle them the way school teachers do. Even that is a shock for them. It’s not just living away from home but managing academics in a place where they are accountable for themselves,” said Servaia.

Missing a deadline carries consequences. “The fees are high, and if they ask for another semester to be completed because one couldn’t submit assignments in time would mean double the fee. That’s when it dawns on them that they better get to act,” said Sapru.

Finding themselves

Many also relish the chance to become someone new. In Calcutta, identity is often tied to family, school and old friends. A big city abroad offers anonymity.

“You can walk through the city alone, try new things, meet people outside usual circles without the feeling that every action will be noticed and judged,” one student said.

By their early 20s, many are planning and funding their own vacations.

Parents often worry about whether their children can cope on their own, but many learn to handle that liberty, said Sapru.

They experiment, experience life and gradually rely less on the comforts they once took for granted.