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regular-article-logo Tuesday, 10 December 2024

International Men’s Day: 6 men from Bollywood films we wish were real

Our picks include films made by Zoya Akhtar, Abbas Tyrewala, Shelly Chopra Dhar, Imtiaz Ali, Shoojit Sircar and Shimit Amin

Chandreyee Chatterjee Calcutta Published 19.11.22, 11:02 AM
Stills from Chak De! India and Ek Ladki Ko Dekha Toh Aisa Laga

Stills from Chak De! India and Ek Ladki Ko Dekha Toh Aisa Laga

On International Women’s Day we celebrate all those strong and extraordinary female characters that have stood out, and rightly so. Just as right is celebrating those male characters who have broken the norm, especially in Bollywood where toxic masculinity is not only reinforced but glorified. So on International Men’s Day, we pick six male characters from Hindi films — young college-goer to septuagenarian, friend to father — who are worth rooting for.

Sunny Gil (Farhan Akhtar) in Zoya Akhtar’s Dil Dhadakne Do

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Sunny Gil is the man we want in our lives, one who can quietly point out that “women’s issues” are not just about safety but also about equality, without having to resort to dramatics. We were that little girl who blurted out “I love you” right after Sunny called out Manav when he was feeling smug about being “woke” enough to allow his wife to run a business despite the fact that no women had done it in his family before. “Why does she need your permission? Allowing someone means you are in a position of authority, of control… that’s not equality,” said a calm and collected Sunny. Bring me those tissues, stat!

Jai Singh Rathore (Imran Khan) in Abbas Tyrewala’s Jaane Tu…Ya Jaane Na

It is a refreshing change to see a male lead character who cooks, does the dishes and washes clothes despite not being a ‘house-husband’. He is just an average guy who has been brought up by a single mother who hasn’t “mera beta”-ed him. He is not the saviour; he is the friend who has your back and won’t judge your actions or feelings even if they seem petty to him.

He is not a saint and does lose his cool but is never unkind, as we see when he breaks up with Meghna. And he is not the hero who bashes people up to prove his manliness, he is absolutely okay to get results by using his brain. But it doesn’t mean he is a coward, because he does go and beat up Sushant after he hits Aditi, only it is not to prove his machismo. We would love to have this antithesis of toxic masculinity as a friend. And we know a good one when we see one.

Sahil Mirza (Rajkumar Rao) in Shelly Chopra Dhar’s Ek Ladki Ko Dekha Toh Aisa Laga

Boy meets girl and falls in love. Boy assumes girl might like him too, so gets drunk and confesses his feelings to her. Girl rejects him because she is in love with another girl. Boy laughs in disbelief and then runs away in embarrassment. But he realises that sometimes relationships don’t have to be romantic and being friends can often end up being more.

Sahil Mirza not only listens to Sweety’s love story with Kuhu, he understands her and accepts her. He also writes a play to help her come out to her parents. But he never assumes he ‘knows’ what it is like just because he is an ally; he pores over Sweety’s diaries, handed over by her, to flesh out the play. A decent guy who can see beyond his own wants is a rarity and we would want to snap up Sahil as a friend in a heartbeat.

Aditya Kashyap (Shahid Kapoor) in Imtiaz Ali’s Jab We Met

Brooding Aditya might not have been overly keen to spend time with the effervescent Geet, but once he realises he has no options he goes along with all of her harebrained ideas, from spending a night in a not-so-decent hotel to jumping into ponds to helping her run away to marry her boyfriend. And though he doesn’t shy away from questioning her decisions, never once does Aditya try to ‘be the man’ and tell her he knows better. The best part? When Geet realises that he has fallen for her, he responds by saying, “tu mujhe bahut zyada achhi lagti hai, but woh mera problem hai. Tujhe bilkul tension lene ki zaroorat nahin hai”.

In a scenario where Bollywood glorifies stalkers, abusers and men who can’t take no for an answer (looking at you Raanjhanaa, Kabir Singh and Ae Dil Hai Mushkil), Aditya is like a sigh of relief.

Bhaskor Banerjee (Amitabh Bachchan) in Shoojit Sircar’s Piku

It doesn’t matter how much Bhaskor and Piku fight, how annoyed Piku is about her father’s irascibility or how Bhaskor makes no bones about the fact that he would do anything to keep his daughter close. At the end of the day, Bhaskor is his daughter’s greatest champion and respects her decisions. Some might say that his opinions about marriage — marriage without purpose is low IQ — and how it shouldn’t be about serving one’s husband and providing sex may have to do with keeping his daughter close, but those saying it might be actually taking away Piku’s agency, of her choice to stay away from marriage to take care of her father. A father who makes no bones about acknowledging his daughter’s emotional, economic and sexual indepence is a rare gem on screen and we’ll thank Shoojit Sircar for that one.

Kabir Khan (Shah Rukh Khan) in Shimit Amin’s Chak De! India

Why Kabir Khan you might be thinking. He is, after all, just another man calling the shots for women and telling them what to do. But it is how he regards the women that puts him on the list. He doesn’t see the players he is coaching as women but as sportspersons, and it makes a world of difference. He pushes them too hard because he has a point to prove, not because they are women.

When Krishna tells him that they don’t have the strength men do, he tells them he is not pushing them for strength but intention. He doesn’t rush in to fight their battles but he makes sure he has their back. He refuses to acknowledge Tripathi’s classification of men’s team vs women’s team, insisting instead that the match will be between Tripathi’s team and his team. He listens to Vidya’s dilemma but doesn’t tell her what to do. We wish we had a coach who would treat us this unbiasedly.

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