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Dear Julia: I’ve been invited to four weddings this season (two as a bridesmaid), plus my own wedding is early next year. I’d like to take advantage of social media to plan and co-ordinate everything, but I don’t know where to begin. Help! — Four Weddings and a Wedding
Dear Five Weddings: Too much of the advice in this realm focuses on violently wrist-slapping guests before they’ve even had so much as a chance to tweet a surreptitious photo of the ceremony — and neglects to mention how helpful social media can be to those planning any large, logistically complex event. Here’s how to get started:
1. Fire up a planning and inspiration blog and send the URL to all your guests. “Social media has totally changed the way that brides and grooms approach their wedding,” explains Abby Larson, founder of the popular wedding inspiration site www.StyleMePretty.com, “They can share fun pics of their planning process, like the cakes they’re tasting or the flowers they’re picking out.” Try a simple platform, like www.Tumblr.com. You can even poll your guests (Venue: Chicago or Jamaica?) with www.SurveyMonkey.com, although that might be some brides’ idea of a nightmare.
2. Create a custom wedding site. Even if you’re not quite up for a blog, most everyone has a custom wedding site to update guests. Try the charming www.WeddingJoJo. com — or www.NearlyWeds.com, which allows you to co-ordinate your wedding website with your paper invitations.
3. Use Google Docs for planning and Google Forms for online RSVPs. My friend Brittany (formerly of Google) is marrying my other friend Dave (formerly of Facebook), in what is sure to be the social media wedding of the year. While Brittany might be just a tad biased, she swears that being able to share Google Docs with planners, vendors and the wedding party has been her “saviour” during the entire process. Can you imagine how much easier it is to co-ordinate bridesmaids without sending 374 emails?
Natalie, another equally tech-savvy bride friend of mine, did the RSVPs for her July 4 nuptials through Google Docs Forms, which morphed the normally curt “yes or no” into a veritable fount of useful information — everything from dietary preferences to whether we were joining them for the fireworks. She says some people were “bewildered”, but most caught on fast: “My grandparents figured it out easily!”
To get started with these free collaborative online documents that multiple users can edit in real time, visit www.Docs.google.com.
4. Establish a Facebook Group months before the event. Many weddings now are weekend-long destination affairs, requiring you to spend an inordinate amount of time with what could possibly be a load of strangers. Why not ensure that your guests have a shot at getting to know one another before they spend 72 hours together? Facebook is the easiest and most common solution, but OneWed.com also has a “Pre-Wedding Party” feature that establishes a private social network just for your wedding. Especially for the singles (ahem), it’s nice to know what your options are ahead of time. Wink, wink.
5. Register on www.ZankYou.com and www.Honeyfund.com. “We don’t really want or need the traditional registry items,” explains bride Natalie. “This site allows our friends and family to help us pay for specific items for our honeymoon — like helping us upgrade to business class, or treating us to a night of dancing in Paris. Infinitely more useful at this point in my life than china sets!”
Dear Julia: I’m recently engaged, but I honestly have no idea what to do now. I need non-cookie-cutter inspiration. Any websites you’d recommend? — More Kristen than Martha (Stewart)
Dear Anti-Stewart: The age of slogging through 700 pages of nearly identical (and identically boring) bridal advertisements to see maybe four or five photos of a real wedding is officially over. Brilliant websites showcasing everything from traditional to DIY abound, spotlighting celebrations so quirky and creative that I’ve taken up “Armchair Wedding Photo Surfing” as a full-time hobby. Seriously.
The fairest of them all? Try www.StyleMePretty.com, which features heartbreakingly lovely, whimsical and romantic real weddings, complete with OCD detail about the thinking behind those weddings — plus links to the vendors. My other favourite? The refreshingly grounded www. APracticalWedding.com, which boasts the most intelligent and real advice around. Other winners: www.OneWed.com, www.Green Wedding Shoes.com, www.BlueberryWeddings.com, www.EmmalineBride.com, www.AlwaysaBlogs maid.com and www.OffBeat Bride.com.
Julia Allison is a veteran columnist, TV personality and public speaker.
