Gender-based violence and abuse and ways to tackle them were at the heart of a play enacted for the students of Lakshmipat Singhania Academy.

Ben Atherton-Zeman, a prevention educator and public speaker from the US who is working to stop gender-based violence, and Sohini Das of the American Center staged the play where the protagonist is a victim of abuse in her relationship and doesn’t know how to come out of it. Together, they talked about the risks of carrying on in an abusive relationship.

“The first risk is physical violence. Next is low self-esteem and third is isolation from friends and family since abuse is something that is embarrassing to talk about,” said Ben. “But what is probably even more risky is emotional abuse. That destroys a person. You have to realise that victims of abuse are not people who make poor choices. It could happen to you too.”

Most young adults, according to Ben, get into relationships without understanding the dynamics of being in one. “More often than not they end up with mean men and are subject to abuse of every kind. Few find the voice to speak up against that abuse,” he said.

Sohini’s word of advice for the students: “Don’t ever let go of your support system”.

“When you are in an abusive relationship, you tend to get confused because your partner is nice and cruel at the same time. Sometimes he is sending you roses and at other time he hits you. You think you love the person and wish if you could somehow put an end to the violence your relationship would work out fine. This is the time when advice from friends and family is precious.”

Another aspect that the duo talked about is how friends of abuse victims need to behave and be supportive. “Maybe you know the guy or girl is not right for your friend. But don’t push it too hard. Provide accurate information if needed but please don’t be judgemental. Be there for them because if you don’t provide that support she will stop listening to you. And may be that will close the only window she has to the outside world,” Ben said, adding that men or boys too can face abuse.

Manisha Lodha, a Class XI student at the school, found the discussion useful. “I had no idea men too face abuse. It was an eye-opener.”

Class XII student Saumya Shankar Ukil found the characters of the play relatable. “I am now better aware of abuse.”