I’m 24 and in love with a boy my age.But my parents have found a boy for me who has a good job. When I told them about my boyfriend they were reluctant to take it further as he’s still looking for work. How can I convince them?

Name and address withheld

Obviously your parents are worried about you: they don’t want some unemployed joker worrying them about money: its not you they are concerned about: it’s the fact their daughter will be hassling them for money just when they believed they’d gotten rid of yet another expense so I don’t blame them at all. My suggestion would be to get married to this bloke and get on with your life. Think of your boyfriend as a bad dream and move on.

I’m 28 and suffer from baldness. I’m depressed as the girl I love said I’m like an elder brother. How can I attract women?

Name and address withheld

I know of a girl who works for a prominent TV channel who’s in love with bald men. So is Pritish Nandy’s wife and they’re not doing too badly. Bald’s the new beautiful: ask me: with my kind of hair, I’m now facing competition from bald men. I know of many who’ve done hair-weaving but that hasn’t altered their choice in women so I wouldn’t worry about being bald. Treat it as an advantage and go forth and ensnare all the women. Trust me, the women today love freaks so being bald is a virtue and not a sin.

I am 32. My wife suspects me of having an affair. However, she talks to a guy from her office late into the night after I fall asleep. Her logic is that she is doing it to make me feel bad and stop having an affair. I am not having an affair at all! Why is she doing this to me?

Name and address withheld

She is like most wives so you should be grateful you have a normal woman. I would not worry about her being the way she is. As for her talking to a man: take this very seriously. This whole thing of her being upset with you is an act. She is the one having an adulterous affair and you are such a dolt that you don’t even know. Women are smarter than you think son. She is taking you for one helluva ride and you are the fool who’s writing letters to me while she is making out with that telephone lover of hers.

HELP AT HAND

Alcoholics anonymous

10A, Nandan Road, Near Ganja Park, Calcutta - 25
Ph: 2419 1174
For free help on alcoholism
E-mail: aakolkata_ig03@rediffmail.com
(2p.m. to 6p.m. Mondays through Saturdays)

Al-Anon (for families and friends of alcoholics)

Ph : 8420738682
(2p.m. to 6 p.m. Mondays through Saturdays)
www.india.al-anon.alateen.org

Narcotics anonymous (Kolkata area helpline)
Ph: 9836223071; www.nakolkata.org
Email: info@nakolkata.org
Self-help group of recovering addicts

HelpAge India

1800-345-1253
Free helpline for the elderly for social, legal, economical, financial counselling and also access to government schemes and policies

Lifeline Foundation

Ph: 2463 7401/ 2463 7432
Free helpline for the depressed or suicidal
(10 a.m. to 6 p.m. Monday through Saturdays)

Sparsha

AE-36, Rabindra Pally, PO: Prafulla Kanan, Calcutta - 01
Ph: 2591 0334, 2591 3852, 6529, 9856
Free tele-counselling and one-on-one counselling on personal relationships and HIV/ AIDS
(10 a.m. to 6 p.m. Mondays through Fridays)

Pronam

38/1, Beltala Road,Calcutta - 19
Senior Citizen’s Emergency
Co-ordination Control Room
Ph: 2419 0740