My friend is 35, working and married, with a child. Her husband isn’t financially stable. Recently, he took a huge loan. Plus, my friend’s in-laws, without telling her, mortgaged her jewellery. My friend’s brother feels she should leave her husband and come and stay with him. What should she do?

S.D., Ranchi

What your friend’s in-laws have done is nothing short of dishonest misappropriation of property and criminal breach of trust, both being punishable offences under the Indian Penal Code under Sections 403 and 405. My advice, as a lawyer, is that your friend’s brother should go to a criminal lawyer and file a criminal case against the in-laws (who can more appropriately be termed outlaws) under the aforesaid two sections. Then just sit back and watch the fun.

Mihir Chakravarti

Calcutta

Your friend should have a frank discussion with her husband about his future plans. If she feels that her husband is not serious about improving his financial situation, she should consider staying with her brother. She should also try and get her jewellery back from her in-laws who had no business to mortgage it.

Dr Anjana Maitra

Koel Nagar, Rourkela

The problem does not seem serious enough to justify your friend leaving her husband. But she definitely needs to know why he took that huge loan and how and why he allowed, if he did, his family to mortgage her jewellery without her knowledge. She needs to keep her cool and deal with the matter diplomatically and bring him back on track.

Shyamal Kumar Surai

Calcutta

Divorce is not the solution. Today your friend’s brother is ready to give her shelter. But tomorrow he might not be so willing to help her. I feel she should give her husband some time to become financially stable. And since she is financially independent herself, why does she have to rely either on her husband or her brother to take care of her?

Sweta Bohra

Calcutta

The husband-wife relationship depends on mutual trust and respect. It is definitely criminal on your friend’s husband’s part to allow her jewellery to be mortgaged without her permission. In all likelihood, she will invite more trouble if she chooses to continue with him. Her husband deserves a good jolt at the earliest. She should immediately accept her brother’s offer.

Hemanta Kumar Dutta

Shibpur

As a dutiful wife, your friend should be with her husband through thick and thin. Leaving home and husband is certainly not the right solution to combat financial crises. Since your friend is working as well, together they can manage the finances for some time. If she chooses to separate from her husband, the child will suffer for it.

Ranita Kakkar

Calcutta

One thing seems clear to me: there is no element of trust in your friend’s relationship with her husband. Your friend will always be vulnerable to similar incidents in her married life. She should try and shift out of her in-laws’ place and spend more time with him to rid his mind of their influence. He seems to be insensitive and frustrated. If she has patience and strength of character, things will improve over time.

Srimanta Roy

New York

Assets are always mortgaged if a family member takes a huge loan. There’s nothing wrong with it, but if the asset has been mortgaged without the consent of the owner, then it’s definitely wrong. However, your friend should think practically and help her husband become financially stable. Taking refuge with her brother might provide temporary relief but it will not help her in the long run.

Nidhi Poddar

Calcutta

It’s your friend’s in-laws who are at fault here, as they did not bother to take her permission before taking her jewellery and even went ahead and mortgaged them. But for this, your friend shouldn’t think of deserting her husband. He would not have taken a huge loan if he had not been in serious financial difficulties.

Sanjay Baidyanathan

Deoghar

I don’t think your friend should leave her husband and stay with her brother. Instead, she should help her husband survive his financial problems. Granted that taking a huge loan and mortgaging her jewellery without her consent is not justified, but this alone cannot be a reason for separation and divorce. After all, she has the future of her child to consider.

Anil Kumar Agarwal

Dhanbad

There’s no reason for her to leave her husband. A crisis in the family cannot be an excuse for breaking up a home. Rather, she ought to be a pillar of strength for her husband and guide him so that he uses the loan money prudently and overcomes his financial instability. Her in-laws were wrong to mortgage her jewellery without her consent. But she is partly to blame here because she should never have kept her jewellery with them.

Falgusree Dasgupta Santiniketan

Just the fact that your friend’s husband took a huge loan is not a good enough reason for her to desert him. Besides, if he took the loan to meet certain liabilities or to set up or expand a business, I see no reason why a wife should leave her husband. Your friend should not take any hasty steps here. If she feels that her husband is not handling his finances properly, she should persuade him to mend his ways and save their marriage from collapsing.

S. K. Khemka

Calcutta