(L-R) Suyasha Sengupta, Rupam Islam and Neel Adhikari chat about Kurt Cobain and Nirvana’s music. Rupam flips through his copy of Kurt Cobain: Journals. Suyasha also has a copy of Journals which she bought after saving up three-months’ pocket money. Neel remembers being blown away by Smells Like Teen Spirit

Smells like teen spirit — An anthem for a generation

Neel: I was blown away by Smells Like Teen Spirit (from the album Nevermind). Nothing has leapt at me so strong from a music system ever in my life. I was singing with a rock band, playing the guitar, and it was the song we all wanted to sing. Immediately, we picked it up and we were playing it, trying to get that level of expression going. The bedroom door would be shut and we would play really loud and I would try to sing on top of that. My voice broke. I could not talk. And then mom and dad would give me weird looks when I came out. That song was part of growing up. And I feel no one has been able to match the clarity and openness of the chorus of Smells Like Teen Spirit.

First Listen

Rupam: The song Where Did You Sleep Last Night (Nirvana’s take on the traditional folk song In The Pines that Leadbelly recorded in 1944 ) made a deep impact on me. The way Kurt would break into this uncontrollable scream after singing a better part of the song in a calm manner was fascinating. After a point his voice broke. There was something about his attitude... he was not hiding anything but giving you this raw emotion. His music was so raw. He was like, ‘This is who I am’. And he was not holding back, he was letting himself go.

Suyasha: I was in Class VII when I heard the album In Utero (1993). My cousin had the cassette and I chanced upon it. I had never heard anything like it before. It had some really cool songs like Dumb and Heart-Shaped Box. The Kurt Cobain we knew was very closed and quiet and his songs were a way to reach out to people. As a person I am also like that. I feel Heart-Shaped Box is about connecting with another human being.

The Connection

Suyasha: I can really connect to Nirvana’s music. Every time I went through a bad phase, I turned to Nirvana. It still happens to me now. When I am down, I turn to Nirvana. For me, Nirvana’s music is very personal. I can relate to their songs. There are very few bands that play such unpretentious music. Kurt Cobain was like, ‘This is who I am, take it or leave it.’ He never pretended to be somebody else. He was so genuine, that’s what I love about him. I was lucky that I stumbled upon Nirvana. The band is a part of who I am.

Rupam: I came to rock music because of Nirvana. My basic philosophy of writing songs is inspired by Nirvana, along with the approach to dynamics, from soft to loud sections.

Neel: I got the energy and the adrenaline rush from Nirvana’s music.

Fan girl

Suyasha: I am kind of obsessed with Kurt. I love Kurt because he was so genuine. He was not pretentious at all. And the aggression and energy in the music helps me let off steam when I get really angry. The music provides a sense of catharsis.

Nevermind — the Breakthrough album

Rupam: The songwriter persona of Kurt comes through clearly on Nevermind. On the previous album Bleach (1989), the band was more in your face. I found songwriter Kurt Cobain on both Nevermind and MTV Unplugged In New York. I would turn to Nirvana during rough times. I would switch off the lights in my room and listen to Nevermind, and it would put me in a trance-like state. Nevermind was my only companion to see me through. Nirvana is a huge thing for me. Those albums were my entry point to rock music.

hearing screams at night

Rupam: I remember this funny incident. I had fallen asleep listening to the album Nevermind at night and then suddenly started hearing this cacophony of screams in my sleep. And I was like, ‘Who all are shouting, screaming, what’s happening… am I dreaming?’ It was the hidden track Endless Nameless, and that’s how I got to know about the concept of the hidden track!

Fave Nirvana Albums

Rupam: MTV Unplugged In New York

Neel: Nevermind

Suyasha: In Utero

Kurt Cobain as

....The Guitar Player

Neel: I used to sing only, and would play the guitar only to compose, but watching Kurt gave me confidence. He was not killing it on the guitar, he was playing a few chords, and I felt I could do that. In the 1980s everyone could play the guitar like a motherf***** but he made playing music more inclusive.

Suyasha: He used different guitar tones, no one really thought of using a fuzz pedal or a muff pedal, he was the first one to put it out there.

Rupam: On stage I play the guitar like Kurt! There are a lot of similarities. I play the guitar really hard using as much strength as possible. And I learnt to play it like that after watching Kurt. When I play the guitar, I feel it’s not me, but Kurt playing. For many years I would break the guitar strings when I signed off.

... The lyricist

Suyasha: I have analysed the f*** out of every song. When I was listening to Nirvana it was the only thing I was listening to, so I was dissecting everything. My fave song is Heart-Shaped Box (from the album In Utero), and I keep going back to that song.

Neel: On Smells Like Teen Spirit, he is talking about the fringes of society… a mulatto, an albino.... And since he has written it in such an opaque way, it can mean a million things. The scramble he does with his lyrics is super.

Rupam: The lyrics came from his personality, and his personality was not very organised. My songs come from real-life experiences but then there are exceptions. Like Bicycle chor. It doesn’t convey the message directly. When I write songs I take both the direct and indirect approach, jekhane heyali kore katha bolchhi. But usually my songs have a concrete theme.

Neel: He made his lyrics opaque, I feel, so that people just listen to the music and feel the energy... to let people feel the human life force behind the music. The lyrics didn’t distract you into thinking about characters or situations or stories or something else. So you got to hear his voice, which is the most true thing. In the scream, and the way he delivered, there is a complete transparency. Fully raw. Like a raw image you take with a Canon 5D! So if the lyrics meant something, then the raw image would get diluted.

Rupam: But then when he sang other people’s songs, they were not opaque, like Where Did You Sleep Last Night or Lake of Fire.

.... The Performer

Rupam: The way he dived on stage... it was as if he was trying to hurt himself, and I have done that. Many times. When I go out to perform, I still believe that this will be my last show. I never try to protect my voice. I give more than 100 per cent. As a rule I never record the next day after a show since my voice gets cracked. I imbibed this philosophy — the whole exercise of using rock music as a destructive tool to destroy yourself so that you free yourself — from Kurt. If you do rock music, you must go through pain. Shorir e jeno byatha hoy.

Suyasha: What I have learnt from Kurt is to give it your all. When I am on stage, I feel that’s what I am born to do. I can’t stage-dive. So more than destroying myself, I let go. I don’t hold back.

Arindam Chatterjee

Pictures: Rashbehari Das
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