Illustration: Uday Deb

Politicians often believe they are doing a service to the nation. Actually, many of them are parasites diverting into their own pocket money meant for the poorest of the poor. They suffer from extraordinary delusions because they have huge egos — what is good for them is good for the world, good for the masses.

In the workplace, managers too suffer from similar delusions. It doesn’t always end in diversion of funds, though examples like Mark Hurd of Hewlett-Packard make one wonder whether there is more of it going on than one realises. A Satyam may get away with it for several years, but most others get caught early in the many checks and balances in the system. Observers feel out of every 100 cases, 99 get settled internally. So firms have a cleaner image than they deserve.

There are other delusions amongst managers that are probably far more dangerous. Many of them, particularly at the CEO level, see themselves as indispensable. Any organisation that doesn’t have a succession plan in place a few years before the retirement of the CEO probably has a megalomaniac at the head. The damage he has done becomes visible only after he has stepped down. It is generally hushed up though; it helps nobody to demolish a corporate icon.

Management textbooks — many of which are also in lip-service mode — justify the mantle of greatness with the excuse that what the CEO did was right for his time. The new man has to spend his initial years undoing all the damage. But that too is “right for his time”. You will see it happening in several business groups in the next few years.

Leave the top brass to their high-powered games. Look at the delusions that managers lower down the line suffer from. Every manager sees himself as a cat at his job; every worker has a radically different impression. A recent study by the UK-based Chartered Management Institute (CMI) brings this out very clearly. For instance, while 44 per cent of the managers polled felt they were excellent at managing people, only 14 per cent of the workers polled felt that their managers had any people skills. There is obviously a yawning gap between perceptions and reality.

A BusinessWeek survey reveals that middle managers have an inflated opinion of their worth. A poll which asked them whether they felt they were amongst the top 10 per cent performers in their company found a whopping 84 per cent say yes. Small wonder they are not prepared when the pink slips are handed around.

Go further down and the problem could be worse. Managers have an outlet in “managing.” Workers in love with their own image of themselves have no such easy vent. Warns Sam Vaknin, author of Malignant Self Love: Narcissism Revisited, and an authority on the subject of narcissism: “Workplace narcissists seethe with anger and resentment. The gap between reality and their grandiose flights of fancy (the ‘grandiosity gap’) is so great that they develop persecutory delusions, resentment and rage. They are also extremely and pathologically envious, seeking to destroy what they perceive to be the sources of their constant frustration: a popular co-worker, a successful boss, or a qualified or skilled employee. Narcissists at work crave constant attention and will go to great lengths to secure it — including by ‘engineering’ situations that place them at the centre. They are immature, constantly nagging and complaining, finding fault with everyone and everything, Cassandras who constantly predict impending doom. They are intrusive and invasive. They firmly believe in their own omnipotence and omniscience. They feel entitled to special treatment and are convinced that they are above man made laws, including the rules of their place of employment. They are disruptive, poor team members, and can rarely collaborate with others without being cantankerous and quarrelsome. They are control freaks and feel the compulsive and irresistible urge to interfere in everything to micromanage and overrule others. All in all, a highly unpleasant experience.”

Do you recognise in this description the guy in the next cubicle?

DELUSIONS AND ILLUSIONS

What managers believe
(% saying they were)

Excellent at managing people 44

Target-busters 21

Strongest at managing themselves 19

Born to lead 14
CMI poll of 2,158 UK managers

What workers feel
(% saying managers are best at)

Getting results 41

Providing strong leadership 37

Excellent at managing people 14

Strongest at managing themselves 8
CMI poll of 6,056 UK workers

Source: Chartered Management Institute