I can’t believe it. Roadies: Hell Down Under is coming to an end. It seems like just last week when I sat down with the gang to figure out what we were gonna do to follow up and beat the very successful Roadies 5.0.

Which country to go to? How to up the intensity of the tasks and blow everyone’s minds with super-unpredictable twists, considering we had given everything we had to the previous season of Roadies? We had no idea what we we’re gonna do. But by now, we were used to the feeling, considering we never have any clue about what we’re gonna do in the next season once a season ends.

Some well-wishers say that we should keep some aces up our sleeve, that we should save some tasks and twists for the coming seasons. The team and I don’t think so. We never hold back. The reason one season rocks is the same reason the next one will; we never, ever give up.

No one knows that Australia wasn’t finalised till the very last second. It was turning out to be too expensive, and we were looking at New Zealand, the adventure sports capital of the world, as an option. But permissions didn’t come through in time, and we had to go with Australia. As we couldn’t afford it, we had to redo most of the creatives at the last minute. But like I said, we never give up, and the results are there for everyone to see.

Time for the auditions. Rajiv was to join me on the panel for the first time. We were both aware that there would be lots of expectations, lots of comparisons. “So how are you defining Rajiv’s role? Is he gonna play good cop?” a lot of friends asked us. “We don’t know,” we both would answer. They couldn’t understand it. They couldn’t understand that the only thing we can do is be ourselves and see what happens. “How can you not have a plan?” they asked, bewildered. That’s the only way we know. We know that the Roadies auditions are what they are because we don’t plan anything. We’re open to what comes our way, and react the most natural way we can. And I had full faith in Rajiv, who I consider to be an evolved thinker.

The auditions were an eye-opener. We pretty much work 24X7, not realising the effect we’re having on the outside world. Rajiv and I were mobbed everywhere we went. The mania we saw for the show blew us away! There were riot scenes everywhere. Especially Delhi. We all know what went down there. What people don’t know is that I was in that building when tens of thousands of aspirants went on the rampage, tearing my posters and baying for my blood. I’ve never been so scared. Not for myself, ’cause the mob, as and when they got to me, would be confronted by an aggressive human wall of my crew-mates, who’d die before letting any harm come to me. I was scared for them. I’ve sworn never to allow them to be in such a dangerous situation again. The next season’s auditions will have a different process. It will come across as unfair, but you have only the Delhi mob to blame for this.

The two people I truly missed this year are Rannvijay and Akshay Kandi, the director of photography. The three of us, I feel, do our best work and have the most fun when we are together. But with all of us getting much busier, it’s becoming more and more difficult for us to be together. This is the price for success, they say. It’s a heavy price, I feel.

The other thing I sorely missed is trying out all the tasks, something I have done for six years, since Roadies 1. There’s nothing that makes me feel more scared… or more alive than trying out the stunts before anyone else, not knowing what can go wrong.

When I announced that I would be going back from the journey shoot for the first time since the beginning of Roadies, there was a surprisingly big hue and cry from viewers and press alike, who assumed that I would not be a part of Roadies anymore. Not true. After 92 consecutive episodes, I had to go back. I had to work on Splitsvilla 2, and I had the confidence not to be worried about what would happen to Roadies.

Over the years, so many people have said that Roadies equals Raghu. That the show would not last without me. All I have to say to that is, the graveyards are filled with bodies of “indispensable” people. The world is still carrying on.

Roadies 1 and 2 were made with a production house, me being the lone warrior from MTV on the crew. I was asked if we should bring the show in-house and make it with an MTV crew after Roadies 2. I refused. I told them that this show required not a crew, but an army to go out and face everything that comes their way. I did not see that hunger, that capability in MTV.

The one man who stood up against that view, the only man who could, was Rajiv. I grudgingly agreed to make Roadies with an MTV team, but screamed my head off at him when we went home. Rajiv took it all calmly, and simply suggested the names of people who’d be able to pull it off. Bumpy, Debby and Chhotu. It is ironical that the same team, that I had such little confidence in, has pretty much retired me. They have become that good. Roadies equals the Roadies crew. I am just the face, the representative of that crew. And I am proud to be that.

What next? I dunno. I have to take a break. I feel exhaustion in every bone. In a few weeks, I take off for the Himalayas, and I don’t know when, or if, I’m coming back. I love not knowing. This might just be my biggest adventure to date!

Catch Kiri, Palak and Nauman (in picture above) fight it out in the grand finale of this year’s Roadies on Sunday at 7pm on MTV