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Pic by Jagan Negi |
My brother, Rajiv Laxman and I were short, sweet and skinny and, to our misery, twins. We were regularly bullied in school. But one day something snapped in me. I was being beaten up by an older and bigger boy and I hit back. Within seconds he retaliated and I was on the floor with the guy pummelling me. A crowd of boys surrounded us and began baying for my blood. I learnt the lesson that people only stand up for the stronger person.
A major turning point came when I was two seasons old in the reality show Roadies that was initially aired on Channel V. The hectic hours led to a complete burnout and I reached a point when I would just sit in office doing nothing. It was during this time that I started playing the guitar. In 2001 I quit Miditech, producers of Roadies for Channel V, and began playing the guitar at restaurants for small sums. I would also play on Marine Drive and then go around with a hat to collect money. I never wanted big sums because I felt that it would cheapen my art.
Subsequently, I joined MTV and soon touched another milestone in my life. The high-pressure job brought me to a breaking point again and I found myself rejecting everything. I even gave up Hinduism. After Season 3 of Roadies, my tough-as-nails image and attitude had made me infamous. I would go to restaurants and sit with my back to people who I could hear abusing me.
I couldn’t take it for too long and set off travelling for about six months. I landed up in a remote place in the Himalayas where I spent two months. It was stripped of all frills and luxuries, had no electricity or phone connectivity. The time spent there in a way healed me. Back to civilisation, I was thinking of writing a book when I got a role in the John Abraham starrer, Jhootha Hi Sahi. My life took yet another turn.
(As told to Saimi Sattar)