By Toutatis, US President Donald Trump has lately been delivering enough asterisks with his promises to earn a punchline in an Asterix album.
He has probably succeeded, depending on how closely you read between lines — or should we say panels — in the new adventure, Asterix in Lusitania, published by Sphere, an imprint of Little, Brown Book Group.
Even without any mention of a character like Trumpetix Tremendix or Tarrifus Terribilis, there is a feeling that the man with an orange tan may have looked over the shoulders of the writer of the new title, Fabcaro, and illustrator, Didier Conrad. The duo have given the creation of the late Rene Goscinny and Albert Uderzo a new mountain to climb and conquer.
In Asterix in Lusitania, the plucky little man, with his boar-loving sidekick Obelix and peevish canine Dogmatix from the small village of indomitable Gauls (who are still holding out against the Romans), must visit Lusitania to rescue Umaminess, who produces garum (which incidentally also goes into Getafix’s magic potion), a fish-based sauce enjoyed by none other than Julius Caesar. Umaminess will be thrown to the lions because of a plot hatched by Roman governor Upwardlimobilus.
“I’m off to Rome. Caesar’s going to make me a consul!… And dictator is only one step away from consul,” declares Upwardlimobilus.
Now, where have we heard the d-word being used in recent times? In August, sitting at his desk in the Oval Office, Trump said: “A lot of people are saying, ‘Maybe we like a dictator’. I don’t like a dictator. I’m not a dictator. I’m a man with great common sense. I am a smart person.”
A few pages later, Asterix and Obelix run into Oldogoltrix and his wife Pearlclutcha, two good-natured senior citizens. “At over 75, we’ve earned more than a bit of rest,” declares Oldogoltrix before going red in the face, screaming: “I mean, do you think Caesar’s going to work till he’s 80?”
When Trump became the 45th President in 2017, he was the oldest, at 70 years old, to be sworn into office. Joe Biden upended that record when he took the oath at 78 in 2021. Like a round of WWE for senior citizens, Trump reclaimed the title this year when he became the 47th President. He was also 78, and on June 14 next year, he will hit the 80 mark, all set to tackle the US midterm election set for November 2026.
After Goscinny’s death in 1977, his friend, the artist Uderzo took on writing duties until 2005 (he died in 2020). He allowed illustrator Didier Conrad to succeed him in the drawing department while Jean-Yves Ferri wrote the stories. The pair continued till 2021, when Ferri handed over his duties to Fabcaroin 2023.
Throughout all the editorial changes, the priorities of the Romans remained the same: to impose taxes. In the new adventure, Caesar announces: “I came to Lusitania to instil Pax Romana, not to taste garum.” (Pax Romana is a roughly 200-year-long period of ancient Rome that is identified as a golden age of increased and sustained Roman imperialism.)
Trump has had his eyes on the Nobel Peace Prize, which slipped out of his sight this year. “They will never give me a Nobel Peace Prize,” he said in February during a meeting with Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu of Israel. “It’s too bad. I deserve it, but they will never give it to me.”
Despite trying to model himself as a peacemaker, Trump hasn’t forgotten about tariffs. A few days back, he said he was terminating negotiations with Canada over high tariffs, while India and the US are once again negotiating a lower tariff.
If Goscinny and Uderzo had a message to convey among all the fun, it had to do with puncturing inflated egos with hilarious monikers. Perhaps the next Asterix album merits a Trumptator. Time will tell, or perhaps, the midterm elections will inspire.
