The glutton

One of the most widely found categories, the glutton jamai enjoys this festival the most. Karunamoyee’s Sankalan Datta, a three-year-old son-in-law, eagerly waits for Jamai Sashthi, even taking leave from office to make the trip to his in-laws’ place in Behala. When his in-laws had asked him what he would like to eat he had mentioned fried rice, ilish paturi, kosha mangsho and kamala bhog. “I got all that and more,” he smiles, smacking his lips and rubbing his belly.

Biplab Basu of New Town’s Greenwood Park too relishes this festival. “My mother-in-law is an amazing cook. Some years, she asks if we should go to a restaurant instead but I veto it as I relish her cooking. I eat so much at her place for lunch that I have to skip dinner that night every year,” he says.

Being a cookbook author, CK Block’s Malini Roye is clearly a favourite with her jamais. “My sons-in-law love Mughlai cuisine so I prepare dishes like Biriyani, Nargisi Kofta, Mutton Chaap and Navratan Korma for them. For dessert I make items like Autumn Pudding, Mousse and Ice-cream with Mango Sauce,” says the lady with the magic ladle.

The weak-bellied

Diametrically opposite to gluttons are the dyspeptic sons-in-law who hardly have the stomach to enjoy the festival. These men may be served the plainest machher jhol but still have to end the meal with an antacid or a trip to the toilet.

“My son-in-law’s work has him touring the country and all the rich food he has to eat round the year has killed his appetite and affected his digestive system,” says Namita Majumdar of Purbachal. So while other in-laws boast of serving hilsa and lobster to their jamais, Majumdar is under strict instructions to prepare a vegetarian meal. “The high point of this year’s menu will be three types of spinaches,” she says with a wry smile.

Similar is the case for jamais trying to watch their weight. “In the first few years of marriage my wife would urge me to eat like a king but as I got older she would sit in front of the pancha byanjon that mother-in-law served and after every mouthful would remind me of my rising blood sugar and cholesterol levels. As I would ignore her warning the next day my stomach would invariably go for a toss,” recalls Somnath Aikath of BC Block.

The accommodating

Considering the heat, the effort and the non-availability of good help in the kitchen, many a son-in-law has all but done away with the festival. “In our time I remember my mother-in-law cooking everything from fried rice and mutton to payesh on Jamai Sashthi but now my son-in-law says he would rather we go to a restaurant,” says Palak Raychaudhuri of BC Block. “Not that I blame him. He does it to make things easier for us but I feel this has no personal touch. The festival has got reduced to a formality.”

The absentee

With so many youngsters settled out of Calcutta, a huge number of parents-in-law are forced to celebrate the festival from a distance. “We celebrated it the first year but now my jamai is in China. We might wish him over phone or Skype but that’s about it,” says Sunil Das of FC Block.

Bijaya Chatterjee of Vidyasagar Abasan may wish her jamai on the day if she remembers to but has taken care of his treat months in advance. “When my daughter’s family comes to Calcutta for holidays I give them money to buy presents for all festivals including Jamai Sashthi,” she smiles.

But some in-laws are still going all the way. FD Block’s Sonali Das’s American son-in-law is posted abroad but this being his first Jamai Sasthi, she is sending him a courier. “I have sent a stitched dhoti with an elastic waistband, a kurta, home-made narkol nadu, kora paker sandesh and his favourite chanachur and muri.” Once the man comes to town in July, there will be a belated Jamai Sasthi treat with special emphasis on his favourite dishes — Lau Chingri and Ilish Paturi.

The reluctant

And then there are those who are opposed to the festival altogether. “No self-respecting man should go to his in-laws’ house asking to be treated like royalty. The fuss is a form of bribe paid to the jamai so he keeps his wife happy round the year,” says Rahul Dutta of CA Block. “But I love my wife as it is and do not want a bribe for it.”

He visits them at different times round the year. “But I am too embarrassed to visit them on Jamai Sashthi and make them spend thousands of rupees buying mangoes, litchis, jackfruits, hilsa and mutton,” says Dutta. While Dutta’s wife and in-laws were sad to hear his take on the festival in the first year of marriage they have now come around.

The deprived

If Dutta declines to accept his Jamai Sashthi invitation, others look on sadly, wishing they would be invited. Sudipta Das, a self-confessed foodie was crest-fallen to learn that his in-laws, who hail from Barishal and are now settled in New Town’s Rail Vihar, do not observe the festival. “All my colleagues leave office by 4pm on Jamai Sashthi but I have to stay and work as I do not have an excuse to leave. The next day I have to grin and bear the accounts of everything they ate,” says Das sadly.

Illustration: Sumitro Basak

HA Block’s Sarmishta Sen Das, who also traces her roots to Barishal, shares a legend about a son-in-law who was headed for Barishal on Jamai Sashthi and lost his life when he got caught in heavy rains on the way. “Since then no one from Barishal celebrates the festival. My husband was most upset to learn he would miss what could have been the most delicious festival of the year for him.”

Then again there are those like Suranjan Bonnerjee of City Centre’s The Residency apartments for whom Jamai Sashthi is now a sad day since his mother-in-law is now no more. “She would express all her love for me through home-cooked food on that day,” says Bonnerjee, recalling the Bori Bhaja, Shak Bhaja, Fish Fry, mutton, chicken, rabri and mishti doi that she would serve in silver crockery every year. “Now every year on Jamai Sashthi I miss her dearly.”

Post-script: Krishna Chowdhury, of New Town’s Balaka complex, is overwhelmed by the love and food showered on him every year but has hit on a quid pro quo. “This year, I have taken leave from office to visit my mother-in-law in Birbhum on condition that next year she will visit us in Rajarhat and allow me to celebrate Sasuri Sashthi,” says the jamai of three years. “My wife and I will cook for her like she does for us. I too want to make her feel like a queen,” smiles Chowdhury.