Indraneil Sengupta's Instagram account showcases the beautiful relationship he shares with his daughter, Meira. While it often appears that he is the contemporary cool dad who attends concerts and enjoys sushi dates with her, Indraneil revealed a different perspective in an exclusive Father's Day interview with t2. Besides completing over two decades, balancing both Bollywood and the Bengali film industry, he also embraces his role as a separated-father to a teenage daughter. Ahead of Father's Day, which is celebrated tomorrow, t2 engaged in a heartfelt conversation with the Puratawn actor about fatherhood, parenting a Gen Z and more.

Does Father's Day hold any meaning for you?

I don’t believe there should be a specific day to celebrate fathers, mothers, children, or anyone else. I find that concept quite superficial, so it doesn’t hold any significance for me.

Since this year it falls on a weekend, do you have any special plans?

No, I’m travelling for a shoot while Meira is away on vacation. I don’t even feel the need to celebrate with an outing, not even for my birthday.

Now that Meira is a teenager, does she plan anything special for you?

Not yet. I don’t have any expectations for her to surprise me with a call or anything. If she remembers and calls, I’ll be happy, but if she doesn’t, that’s perfectly fine too. I don’t think it’s a major issue. Although she is a teenager, to me, she’s still a child, and I want her to live her life and enjoy it.

What is your favourite way to spend quality time with her?

These days, when we meet, we usually go out for dinner at places she enjoys, which is often sushi. She would love it if I went on roller-coaster rides with her, but I’m terrified of them, so I don’t. When she was younger, we used to visit Imagicaa, but it required a friend to accompany us since I’m very scared of heights. On her birthdays, we sometimes go shopping.

Teenagers have a mind of their own. Do you both disagree on anything?

Not really. She’s only 13, and I’m not a particularly stubborn person. I never impose my opinions on her. I try to guide her by saying what might not be a good choice or suggesting alternatives, but I never force anything. I’ve never had a transactional or blackmailing relationship with her or anyone. I maintain a level of decorum with her and have made it clear that she’s a minor and I am her father. There may be decisions made for her own good that she doesn’t agree with at this age, but she’s too young to engage in serious disagreements. When she becomes an adult, I’ll respect her opinions, but as a parent, I will share my views, and it will be up to her to decide.

Has she started watching your films?

No, not at all. She doesn’t watch any films! Like many kids today, she isn’t interested in Bollywood. She only watches certain types of English films. But once she grows up and develops her tastes, she might want to watch my films. I tried to introduce her to Feluda to spark her interest in the films, but it didn’t work out. I felt she wasn’t inclined, so I didn’t push it. She should feel free to watch whatever she likes; it doesn’t have to be her father’s work just because I’m an actor.

Is there a traditional parenting style that you disagree with?

Yes, I disagree with the idea of molding a child into a certain form. I believe this can be harmful to their development. Instead, there should be an environment that inspires children to become what their parents hope for them. If you want your child to be active in sports, the home environment should reflect that — perhaps by watching sports together or the parents participating themselves. I believe every child has inherent traits, and parents can’t design or change that.

Additionally, I dislike the concept of punishment. Some parents approach their relationship with their child in a transactional way, like saying, "If you don’t finish your homework by this time, you won’t get TV time." While discipline is important, it doesn’t have to come from a place of punishment. I believe that the best part of my relationship with my daughter is the firm sense of discipline we share, but it’s not driven by fear or force. I lead a disciplined life, and I create an atmosphere where she spends her time. She may not always want to do everything on time, but I think that’s the best way to influence a child.

You come across as a very cool dad on Instagram. What is the most non-traditional thing you’ve done as a parent?

I don’t think I come across as a cool father. Even if it appears like that, it’s not a conscious effort at all. A couple of things I do differently from how I was raised is to communicate more openly with Meira than my father would have with me. This is probably due to the times we live in. However, I also maintain strong boundaries. I remember seeing an interview of Abhishek Bachchan, and his views resonated with me. I’m friendly with my child, but I’m not her friend. I appreciate the distinction of being her father rather than a pal. Since she’s a girl child, I discuss various topics with her but always within limits. I want her to feel comfortable enough to talk about things that genuinely concern her and need to be discussed with a parent. But I don't feel the need to know every bit of her life.

As a separated father working in the demanding entertainment industry, how do you balance your career demands with parenting responsibilities?

My daughter lives with her mother, so my parenting responsibilities are somewhat limited because I don't live with her. Whenever she comes to my place, my parents stay over as well, so she's never left alone at home if I have to go somewhere. I'm completely comfortable travelling with her to my workplace if she's available, but I usually don't ask her to come when I'm not free.

I believe I was raised well, and my parents never sat down to create a flowchart of parenting responsibilities. I don’t think anyone from the past generation did that. I had a great childhood, which wasn't dictated by any specific guidelines; it was just a normal, easy, and leisurely upbringing. I believe that's still possible today. In our age of over-information, we often complicate things before we even take a breath — we read multiple books on parenting and overthink it. Some things are just natural. Parenthood is natural. The father-daughter relationship is also something that should flow naturally.

What is the most important value or lesson that you hope to instill in her?

I want her to be her own individual. I want Meira to be Meira; I do not want her to simply be identified as my daughter. I'm against the notion of entitlement in any relationship, including the one with my child. I tell her that as she grows up, she will have many more relationships — she will be someone’s mother, girlfriend, wife, sister but ultimately, she needs to be herself, not defined by someone else. I encourage her not to control her relationships or her future. I tell her to pursue her goals and work hard to achieve them, but if things don't go as planned, that's okay. Anything can happen in this world; I remind her that she shouldn't think the world revolves around her.

How do you handle difficult conversations with her?

I think I've only had a couple of difficult conversations with her, they involved her, but she wasn't responsible for them. So, the most important thing is to be honest and to present information as it is. I share and discuss things with her without pushing her to form a particular opinion or take a specific stance; I feel that would be selfish. I provide her with facts, but I don’t try to shape her opinion.

Are you a liberal parent?

I consider myself a very liberal person, but not necessarily a liberal parent.

What makes you most anxious as a parent of a Gen Z kid?

I don’t think she has a social media account yet, as she isn't allowed to have one at this stage. One good thing about her is that she is honest. But tomorrow she might have an account. I’ve taught her to be cautious in public, to avoid engaging with strangers, and not to share personal details. She knows that if she ever feels uncomfortable with anyone, she should inform her parents, even if it involves one of her parents, she should communicate it to the other parent.

How do you prioritise guilt-free self-care?

I emphasise to my child that self-care is crucial. I’ve always told Meira that if you cannot keep yourself happy and take care of yourself, you’ll impose the responsibility of your happiness onto others, which can make life difficult for them. It's important to focus on your own well-being. For instance, when she comes home, she often spends time in my room doing her own thing while I sit in a corner reading a book or watching something. We can spend hours like that, each engaged in our own activities. Initially, I tried to find things we could do together, but then I realised she just wants to spend time with me, not spend time doing something together. It's perfectly healthy for us to have our own space.