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At one point it seemed to Sandhya that she had found the man of her dreams. After registering with an Indian matrimonial website, the 20-something Mumbai girl sifted through a host of profiles of prospective grooms before zeroing in on a man from North India. They chatted online, exchanged emails and spoke over the phone for a few months. Then they decided to get married. The man seemed to be the epitome of politeness to both Sandhya and her parents.
All was well till Sandhya’s parents chose to do a cursory verification of the background of the groom-to-be. “It was quite a shock for the girl and her folks! It was found that the man was married with two children. He also belonged to a well-known political family,” says Savio Kale, director, Indian Bureau of Investigation, a private detective agency in Mumbai which deals in matrimonial investigations. “We had to bring the girl all the way from Mumbai to meet the man’s family to make her believe it!”
Sandhya’s is not an isolated case of unsuspecting men and women being duped by fraudsters on matrimonial websites. Last month, an engineer with an aviation giant was arrested in Mumbai for marrying 14 women over a period of two-and-a-half years. He used a matrimonial website to find his brides.
“Our agency has been increasingly receiving matrimonial website cases over the past few years. We check the personal history of prospective brides and grooms on behalf of people who are selecting life partners through various matrimonial websites,” says Kale.
Consumer expert Bijan Mishra feels that matrimonial websites can be a happy hunting ground for fraudsters. “There is no mechanism yet in India to address this particular menace,” says Mishra, managing director, Consumer Online Foundation, Delhi, a resource centre for consumer research and policy in India.
A recent study conducted by the New York-based EmPower Research LLC, which specialises in business research and information consulting for industries, says e-matrimony sites in India are headed for a stupendous subscriber and revenue growth in the next five years. The online matrimonial industry in the country is expected to grow by 40 per cent annually. The EmPower study predicts that by 2011 there would be 30 million registered users and revenues can hit $63 million. The study also underlines e-matrimony sites’ need to “incorporate industry-best security measures to guarantee a private and secure experience for subscribers”.
“Matrimonial websites have to go beyond simplistic screening systems for users. They have to be more thorough in their verification processes,” says Kyung Han, managing partner, EmPower Research, who’s also the lead author of the study. He feels that matrimonial sites need to monitor the online behaviour of their members. “They can check if any particular member is indulging in suspicious activities on the site. For example, they can be making offensive remarks against other members. Also, matrimonial sites need to track their members’ behaviour on other portals. So a 360 degree online security system is the need of the hour,” says Han.
He goes on to say that the popularity of such websites spreads by word of mouth. “If the sites fail to provide a more secure environment for users, their reputation will be dented. And the sites can wind up in a year or so.”
Those who run matrimonial sites point out that it is impossible for them to thoroughly check the credentials of every member. “It’s really not possible for matrimonial websites to screen all members individually because of the sheer number of users,” says Vivek Pahwa, CEO, Accentium.com, an Internet company that owns secondshaadi.com, a website catering to divorced men and women looking to marry a second time. Launched in 2007, the portal now boasts of 1.2 lakh registered users (10-15 per cent of them are non-resident Indians).
“We operate with utmost caution. We don’t share personal information of users with anyone,” continues Pahwa. “If a match goes awry, please don’t blame the medium. Why should we be dragged to court? One can be duped even through a marriage ad in a newspaper!”
Agrees Murugavel Janakiraman, CEO, Bharat Matrimony, one of the pioneers in the e-matrimony industry. “As portals, we can only provide information. Unlike online shopping, marriages through portals take place in the real world. So you can verify credentials before taking the plunge,” he says. “The onus is really on the users. Please do proper background verification. First get to know each other well through email, phone calls and references from coworkers or other people. In India, we have the culture of meeting parents. So do involve them.”
Janakiraman cites his own story. “I was in the US when I came across my wife’s profile on an e-matrimony portal. She was in India at that time. We talked over the phone for months. Then our parents visited each other’s home in India,” he narrates. “Everything was properly verified.”
According to Pahwa, sometimes matrimonial websites partner with private security agencies and, therefore, can check the credentials of prospective grooms or brides on users’ request. Apparently, Bharat Matrimony has its own matrimonial verification service that can be availed of for a certain fee.
Yet, some experts feel that mere disclaimers on matrimonial websites are not a strong armour against fraudsters. “Existing laws such as the Consumer Protection Act, 1986, need to be strengthened so that they can cover such cyberfrauds,” says Mishra. “Portals offer value-added services against a fee. But what do you do when you have paid for the online services and don’t get the value? Therefore, all websites that market their services for a fee need to be regulated by a standard mechanism and harsh penalties need to be introduced for such offenders.”
Mishra adds that service providers should also be made accountable. “It should be made mandatory for all websites to mention their service providers who in turn should screen portal owners before hosting them.”
Kale feels women users need to exercise more caution while divulging personal details on matrimonial websites. The UK-based Shamim Ara Begum, who got married to her husband through a matrimonial portal in 2001, says, “It’s important to remember that one should not get carried away by emotions. You should know what you are looking for. And you shouldn’t shy away from a thorough verification. You need to have your feet on the ground.”
After all, not all matches are made in heaven!