She is an expert housekeeper. Every time she gets divorced, she keeps the house,” goes a joke. Alas, says an English friend of mine, currently in the throes of a second divorce, if this were only true! Though the house was hers long before her present marriage, her husband has laid claim to it and refuses to move out. A long legal battle lies ahead before a solution can be found.
Ironically, in America and Britain, where divorce is rampant, neither husband nor wife can count on getting the house. In fact, couples feel increasingly compelled to stay in the same house after their marriages break down, the reason being that property prices being what they are, neither can afford to buy a comparable house after selling the one they had while they were married. These money-over-love couples find themselves staying in the same house, though not speaking to each other or having anything to do with each other.
Others choose the option of staying married, however unhappy they might be, again for the same reason. These are generally in a minority. Extraordinarily, the divorce rate seems to be tied to property prices. When house prices rise, divorce rates fall and vice versa!
Not surprisingly, couples increasingly elect to live together as partners, rather than marry and then go in for a messy divorce. The theory is that when they no longer enjoy being together, they can simply part company without acrimonious arguments about who gets what. However, it doesn’t quite work out that way all the time. So much so, I am told, that many such couples now take the precaution of signing a contract that stipulates in advance the division of material goods, much in the nature of prenuptial agreements that some of those hazarding marriage sign.
So what is the situation in India? I suspect that since young couples do not often own their homes, neither property nor the lack of it makes a difference. Whether this is true or not, a divorce boom is currently taking place. Marriage meltdown is on the rise in India, with some 280 divorce petitions being filed in Delhi alone every week. Paradoxically, in some areas, the number of divorce petitions being filed has even overtaken the number of marriages taking place!
Indian couples largely divorce by mutual consent, with more women filing for divorce than men. There is no stigma attached to being divorced, nor to women making it on their own. The perception of marriage appears to have changed amongst the young. Gone are the ideas of a lifelong commitment. Divorce now is the first resort rather than the last. Today’s mantra is that life is short and we want to have fun. If things don’t work out, it’s time to walk out, with or without property.
