I was attending a busy mid-week outpatient clinic when the phone rang. A reporter from a popular vernacular TV channel wanted to come and record my “bite” about a sensational murder, where the accused had entombed his lover’s body. What kind of mental illness could this man, accused of multiple murders, be suffering from, was the question.
Another conversation. Someone whom I know very well and whose views I respect, complained to me: “Why do you have the word ‘Mental’ in the name of your organisation?” Apparently it dissuades people from visiting the organisation whose primary aim is to work with people suffering from mental illnesses.
Finally, another recent incident. A colleague of mine was invited to address the employees of a large organisation about mental health awareness. She used a technique described by a journalist to highlight her point. She started by asking the audience to stand up. She then asked them to keep standing if they or their family have suffered any kind of mental illness, and most of them kept standing. Then, she asked them to keep standing only if they have been able to talk openly about their experience of mental illness. Most sat down.
You must be wondering what is the connection between these seemingly different incidents. There is a link. It is about our attitude towards mental illness. It is the fear, shame, prejudice, ignorance and discrimination persons suffering from mental illness are subjected to that I want to highlight.
When someone does something horrific, such as premeditated multiple murders, and then entombs the body of one of his victims and lives in the same house for months, the first thing that comes to our mind is, is he “mad”?
This innocent question, unfortunately reveals a deep-rooted stigma faced by the mentally ill. Why should we automatically examine inexplicable and terrible crimes through the lens of mental illness? Where is the evidence that mentally “sane” persons do not commit terrible crimes?
The problem lies with how we view someone with mental illness. It is with fear and uncertainty. They are untouchables and dangerous. They are the pariahs of our society. Hence, the request to drop the word “mental” from an organisation which stands alongside people with mental illness. It would apparently encourage people to seek help if the word “mental” was not mentioned.
It is the same fear of marginalisation and uncertain response that prevents us from disclosing that we suffer from a mental illness. The reactions are not the same when someone discloses they have a heart problem, a broken bone or an inefficient lung.
Being a psychiatrist, I have a ringside view of how people’s lives can be turned upside down not only by the mental illnesses they are suffering from, but also from the reactions of other people when they find out that someone has been suffering from mental illness. Most of my patients say that the latter is often more hurtful and soul-destroying.
THE FRIENDLESS GIRL
Rajita (name changed) was my sister’s friend. She came home from her elite girls-only, residential school during summers. She was the girl everyone in our neighbourhood loved to hate. She was smart, articulate, strikingly attractive but with an obnoxious and arrogant attitude which repelled any attempts to befriend her.
Years later, I found out through my work that she had a mother who suffered from schizophrenia. Rajita told me she was petrified during her summer visits to Calcutta that some of her friends may want to come home to meet her. Hence, she had to be rude and arrogant to avoid having friends. This is how she protected her secret. By becoming unpopular and by robbing herself of friendship and camaraderie in her adolescence and youth.
People, unfortunately, are unaware of the fact that the vast majority of mentally ill people are not violent or dangerous. In fact, research conclusively shows that persons with mental illness are very often victims of violence rather than being perpetrators.
The popular image of a mentally ill person as a crazy, unpredictable, knife-wielding killer who can suddenly inflict violence is totally distorted. It is this distorted lens that leads us to immediately label killers as “mentally ill”.
But slowly a change is coming about in this discrimination towards the mentally ill in our country. The recent Mental Healthcare Bill, passed by both Houses of Parliament, is a huge step in the right direction.
The fearless and candid self-disclosure by Deepika Padukone about her own experience with depression has helped all of us to take note that depression can affect anyone and everyone. Suffering from a mental illness is not a sign of being a “weak person”. The recent campaign to demystify depression, ‘Let’s Talk’, by the World Health Organisation also symbolises the global commitment to tackle the stigma from all quarters.
In my experience, it is the lack of knowledge about mental illnesses that perpetuates our discriminatory behaviour.
Widespread dissemination of facts regarding mental illness is essential, but that is often not enough. What possibly works best in dispelling the fear and uncertainty in our minds about mental illness, paradoxically, is contact with a person living with mental illness. When we find out that our colleague or neighbour whom we have known for many years has been silently suffering from a mental illness, we find it easier to understand and accept. Research confirms this observation.
MAKE IT ACCEPTABLE
But how can we do it? Schools and workplaces have to set the ball rolling. Employers and teachers need to do more to make it acceptable to be mentally unwell at the workplace or in school. Probably the most powerful change will be when senior staff take the initiative and talk about their own struggles.
What can one do at an individual level when we find out that someone we know is suffering from mental illness? All of us can reach out, one does not need to be a mental health professional to do it.
Small things can make a big difference. Talk, but listen too. Simply being there will mean a lot.
Keep in touch. Meet up, phone, email or text.
Do not just talk about mental health, chat about everyday things as well.
Be patient, ups and downs can happen.
Dr Jai Ranjan Ram is senior consultant psychiatrist and
co-founder of Mental Health Foundation (www.mhfkolkata.com). Find him on Facebook @ Jai R Ram
