Survival Strategies

Suhel Seth has an unconventional take on personal problems — and their solutions

  • Published 23.10.16

I am a 19-year-old girl in a relationship for two years, but I feel that he pays more attention to his friends and his career than me. I am also sure he’s flirting with a classmate he chats with. I love this guy but cannot cope with all this.

Name and address withheld

Flirts? In today’s Ravana-riddled times you’re lucky he isn’t sleeping with an entire dormitory of girls! And you take umbrage to the fact that he only talks to them? Listen girl, this is 2016. The era of Trump. The era of Kejriwal. The era of Kim Kardarshian and you are worried if your boyfriend talks to another girl? Grow up and smell some weed. You should pray. You should feel blessed that you have this wonderful lad who is only using his tongue to talk. When you finish reading this, go to a place of worship and express thanks.

I’m a 16-year-old boy and in love with a girl in my class, but she’s not into me. She told me so. I fear that nobody else will accept me any more. I am tormented everyday when I see her as I can never be with her. Help.

Name and address withheld

Listen son, at 16, the world awaits anyone. Including losers like you. So you have very little to be concerned about. I would have worried if this affair of yours would have lasted. You are 16, not Fevicol. I suggest you recognise the realities of our times. These are times of the ATM; the quickie; tongue-surgery and so on. These are times when attention spans have dwindled so you needn’t worry. You will find a garden-full of women as you grow older and hopefully wiser. This is just a speedbreaker on your road to love and not the cul-de-sac.

I’m a 33-year-old woman married for six years, but my husband hasn’t consummated our marriage. He wants more time. Should I trust him and stay? What will I do with my life?

Name and address withheld

Six years and nothing? Look, I don’t know how to break this to you, but your husband hasn’t been faithful unless, of course, his sexual preferences are different or have altered. If for six years he hasn’t slept with you, then he never will. I suggest you move on, or start sleeping with other folks. This is the reality. Sad as it is, but at least your conscience will not prick you, if you know what I mean?

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