Always draped in her exquisite kantha saris and luminous pearls, Shamlu Dudeja is a picture of quiet elegance. Yet beneath that calm, affable exterior lies the heart of a fighter. For Shamlu has always struggled hard to get what she wants ? be it persuading former Aussie captain Steve Waugh to build a girls’ home in Barrackpore, or convincing rural women to harness their talent for the kantha stitch, or even overcoming a string of personal tragedies. Yes, Shamlu Dudeja is certainly a woman of true spirit.

A former maths teacher, Shamlu gave up teaching when she was stricken with cancer in the mid-80s. During that time, she came across some girls from Shantiniketan doing a fair in the city. Impressed by their kantha wall hangings, Shamlu invited them home and asked them to embroider a few saris for her. That was the beginning of Mallika’s Kantha Collection, Shamlu’s well-known boutique in Alipore. “Once I learned the significance of kantha in a rural woman’s life, it became my raison d’?tre. I lived to promote it and the women behind it,” she says. Today Mallika’s Kantha Collection participates in exhibitions across the world, in New York, London and more recently in Santa Fe, New Mexico.

Besides her role as a kantha revivalist, Shamlu is also the chairperson of the Calcutta Foundation. A few years ago, the charity trust joined forces with Steve Waugh to build Udayan, a home for young girl children of leprosy patients. Again with Waugh, Shamlu also raised Rs 35 lakh for 500 low-cost shelters on Hut Bay Island in the Andamans after the 2004 Tsunami.

Encouraging Shamlu all the way is her daughter Mallika. Once an integral part of Mallika’s Kantha Collection (she introduced to kantha, the concept of tailored garments like salwar-kurtas, something never attempted before), today Mallika prefers to spend all her energy on her two daughters and husband Sharad Varma. That’s when she’s not busy looking after her pre-school, Kangaroo Kids, a project, which mother Shamlu says had her “over the top with joy ? you see, I come from a family of teachers.”

SHAMLU:

Mallika’s role in my life has always been that of a little angel. When I was diagnosed with cancer, she was there. When I had a cardiac scare recently, Mallika marched me off to Mumbai for a battery of tests. Sometimes, I laughingly refer to her as my mother-in-law. But yes, my daughter has been a great equaliser ? she balanced the equation between my son and I, as well as between my husband and me.

Mallika was a very playful little girl. Even when she was just five, if she’d find her father feeling tired after work, she’d go out of her way to cheer him up. Somehow she always managed to sense when there was a disturbance, and would give of herself in any way she could, to ease the situation. That’s Mallika for you!

When my son Kabir died eight years ago, Mallika was the one who helped me through the pain. Kabir was the manager of the Calcutta Foundation Orchestra. And she urged me to get involved with the orchestra, as she felt it was a good way for me to stay connected with Kabir.

In 1998, just a year after Kabir passed away, my husband Vijay expired. Suddenly I was all alone. However, it was around that time, that Steve Waugh came onto the scene, and we organised one fund-raiser after one another for the home in Udayan. But once all the events finished, I had to return to an empty house, and I grew depressed. One day, Mallika gave me a severe talking-to. She stressed that for the first time in 60 years, I was my own boss and that I could do whatever I liked. Thank God for her good sense, for only after that did I bounce back.

My sole complaint is that I’d like to see more of Mallika. I’d love to take a holiday with her ? maybe five days of mother-daughter time in Thailand. I’d also love to have lunch with her once a week. But I do appreciate that she is busy with her daughters and I know in my heart, that a more wonderful daughter I couldn’t have asked for!

MALLIKA:

My mom and I share a very free and easy relationship. Whenever I need advice, I always turn to her. She’s definitely a person that I look up to.

With the deaths of my brother and father in just one year, it seemed that tragedy was dogging our family. I was married at the time and pregnant. So while I had Sharad and my kids to turn to, mom was alone. Yet the grit and determination she showed during that traumatic time was nothing less than inspiring. She bounced back with a new found faith and resolve and immersed herself in helping the underprivileged. That’s one of the many life lessons I’ve learnt from her ? to smile through your troubles.

Today when I look at her as a single woman, having been through all that she has, I have the deepest admiration for her. She prefers to be independent and stay on her own.

Looking back, my mother was the coolest parent and I discussed all my girlie problems with her. She was also a hands-on mom ? always home when we got home from school. That’s something I’ve passed down to my kids ? a sense of security and well-being as soon as they walk through the door. It’s not like she led her life around us, but mom pursued her interests without putting those special things a mother does for her child on the backburner.

My mother also played an integral part in launching my career as a designer. I was in Class 12 when I had my first exhibition and I remember she was instrumental in organising it. But after my in-laws passed away, I decided to spend as much time as I could with my family. Mom took over the boutique and runs it like clockwork to this day.

While I admire many qualities in my mother, I feel she can be very gullible. Also, she needs to slow down. I wish she’d devote some quality time to herself, but she disagrees. Recently I took her for an angiogram. After the reports came in, the doctor said I had nothing to worry about. “Your mother has a heart of a horse,” he quipped. That did it for mom, as she hugged the amused doctor, declaring triumphantly that she’d proved herself fit and fine. I couldn’t have been happier myself!

Photograph by Supratik Chatterjee