Ratan, who?” Unlike Ishaan for whom Darsheel Safary will always have instant recall, Ratan rings no bells for Aamir Khan. Star, producer and now director, Khan was about the same age as Safary when he made his first celluloid appearance in the 1973 film Yaadon ki Baraat as Ratan who would grow up to be the singer Montu played by Tariq Khan.

“I remember the experience of acting in that film. It was very unpleasant,” says Khan, who was then all of eight. “I was very scared of all the shouting on the sets. Now I realise it was the lighting department screaming their heads off. Today, we have walkie-talkies. I was also very stiff and self-conscious, unlike Darsheel who is a very gifted actor. My first film was not fun for me,” recalls Khan.

As a first-time director, however, the experience has been far more heartwarming. He is soaking in all the accolades that have come his way with Taare Zameen Par, his directorial debut about Ishaan, a dyslexic child and his arts teacher, essayed by Khan himself. “It was meant to be an engaging film that would suck you in. The response has been overwhelming from parents, children and even the youth. Another concern was that for a film to go from hit to super-duper hit, people should want to see the film again. They did and that surprised me,” smiles Khan. According to reports, the film plundered the box office with Rs 15 crore in the first three days and is still going strong.

We are sitting at his den in his flat at Bandra, western Mumbai, where he grew up. Tucked away next to a school, it’s easy to whiz past the ancient signboard to his home. Once inside, afternoon light streams in from windows into a room that is lined with well-thumbed fiction, film biographies, Indian history, encyclopaedia sets, DVDs and board games. There is a mounted TV, and a framed note of appreciation for Lagaan — Khan’s first home production — from cinematographer K.K. Mahajan on the far side.

Comfortable settees with plump cushions take centre stage on a wood finish floor and Khan is hunkered down between a glass table and the sofa. He had ducked in earlier to apologise for running late. This time around, he courteously asks, “May I sit down?” He means down literally. Feel at home. He laughs at that.

He is far better looking off-screen and has such luminous eyes that his pocket-edition built becomes irrelevant. For this stern actor it is obvious that his face is the magnet. At 42, he is dressed in a white shirt and blue jeans that whisper money. He is sporting one of his best haircuts ever: simple, yet chic.

That hair is all set to go next year. During the post-production stage of TZP, Khan shot 50 per cent of his next starring film: the Hindi remake of Tamil blockbuster Ghajini, for which he will shave his head. Not for the first time. Two decades ago, he had a shining pate for Holi. Vanity bows to an actor’s craft. “I don’t think I am all that good looking, actually. I find other actors — Shah Rukh, Salman and both the Akshayes (Kumar and Khanna) — far better looking. Hrithik and Saif are very good looking. I am not terribly conscious of the way I look. Losing my hair would bother me but shaving it off doesn’t,” he smiles.

Ghajini is a remake of the Hollywood film Memento, about a man with a faulty memory who tries to solve a murder. “To be honest, I didn’t understand Memento. I loved Ghajini though. It is very moving. I have shot for 45 days for the Hindi version (yet untitled). I have thoroughly enjoyed working with Ghajini’s director A.R. Murugadoss for this version,” Khan says.

Overlapping roles of being actor and director are not an issue, maintains Khan, who has been accused of directing his directors in the past. “The biggest myth is that I ghost direct my films and that I am a control freak. As an actor I have expressed myself but I have always gone with what my director wants. In Lagaan I went with Ashutosh (Gowarikar’s) instinct even when I disagreed and could have pulled rank.”

Khan has a reputation for marching to his own beat, for doing one film at a time even if it means a four-year gap between two releases. Even so, it was a rare self-confidence that saw him jump in at the deep end to wield the director’s baton with TZP. Has he always been so confident? “I don’t think so much about myself but if I were to look back on my actions it would indicate I am a confident person. I have taken decisions and stuck to them even when they have been risky. If I believe in something then it doesn’t matter if the rest of the world doesn’t agree with me. I act from the heart, so I don’t think of consequences,” Khan reflects.

These actions have been both personal and public. He dropped out of college at 17 to pursue a career in films despite family objections — father Tariq Husain and uncle Nasir Husain were both producers and directors who wanted to save him from a life of instability. He supported the Narmada dam oustees. He joined a peace campaign after the Gujarat riots.

Khan, clearly, believes in wearing his heart on his sleeve. Isn’t that naïve? “I don’t know if that is an apt word but I’d like to believe I am an idealistic person. You can describe it as naïve but I think I am a fairly sensitive and emotional man, and I follow my heart,” he reiterates.

Add sentimental to that. He has collected all the clapboards from all his films. He keeps a few costumes and accessories from each of his films, including the hanky that adorned his neck in Rangeela, props of main characters and a wooden cricket bat and ball from Lagaan. Any souvenirs from his Maharashtra state level tennis player days? None.

Polite as ever, he asks if it’s all right to smoke. “I will sit by the window,” he says.

No pushover, the actor is willing to talk even when he is tossed questions he would rather decline. Decline he does when asked about the court case involving the custody of his brother Faisal. “That is something very close to me and I am not comfortable discussing it on a public platform,” he says evenly.

Relationships, even fractured ones, are important to him. You won’t find him at page three dos or Saturday night dances, but he has a very active social life, thank you very much, and reels off the names of his closest friends. His first film as an adult was an experimental one for good buddy Aditya Bhattacharya in their teens. Called Paranoia, it was never shown, of course, but infected Khan with the acting bug. Next came Ketan Mehta’s Holi which got only a television release. And then, in 1988, cousin Mansoor Khan’s tragic love saga Qayamat Se Qayamat Tak made Khan and his co-star Juhi Chawla cult idols.

“I like to meet new people. I like to suck people’s minds if I can put it that way. So if I meet an interesting person I just want to drink in what that person has to say,” Khan laughs. So who is his 3 am friend? “If I have a problem and my wife Kiran is not there then it will be my cousin, Nuzhat.” Khan has two children from a previous marriage and shares a warm relationship with them. “I think I am a good dad,” he chuckles. “They are really great kids, with good minds. I love spending time with them.”

Inquire what his prized possessions are and he retorts, “Apart from human relationships?” Young Darshan — who has been quoted as saying that Khan was not just a director but a pal on the sets — will endorse that.