The Telegraph
Friday , March 22 , 2013
Since 1st March, 1999
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Festive spirit

- Got a hasya kavi sammelan to attend? Read on to stock up on humour

■ A woman was walking around a supermarket with her three-year-old daughter. At the chocolate counter the child asked for some and the mother refused. The kid threw a tantrum.

Mother: Calm down, Sonia. We just have three more aisles left now.

The child calmed down. But at the cookie counter the kid started wailing when refused cookies.

Mother: Don’t scream, Sonia. Just one more aisle left till we go home.

The child stopped crying but started again when the mother refused to buy her a colouring book later.

Mother: Sonia, I promise you can take a nice nap once we get home. Just hang in there, sweetie.

The child quietened after a while. A man who had been observing the whole incident came by and spoke to the mother.

Man: Ma’am, I couldn’t help but notice how well you managed your daughter. Sonia is very lucky to have a mother like you.

Mother: I’m Sonia. My daughter’s name is Neha.


■ A rich man throws a party. He gathers everyone around his swimming pool for an announcement.

Rich man: This pool is full of hungry crocodiles. I want to see if anyone is brave enough to jump into it. If anyone can swim across it and come out alive I will give him anything he asks for.

After a while one man jumps in and after a bloody battle with the crocs, climbs out.

Rich man: Congratulations young man! You are very brave indeed. Now what is it that you want?

Young man: The name of the man who pushed me in!


■ Joy approached his boss one day.

Joy: Uh, boss could I get a leave tomorrow?

Boss: What for?

Joy: My mother-in-law has come to town and I have to take my wife and her shopping.

Boss: I’m sorry Joy, I can’t allow leave for such reasons.

Joy: Oh, thank you boss! I know I could count on you.


Two aged men were having a chat.

Bob: Billy, how’s the new memory clinic you’re visiting?

Billy: Great. They have many techniques to improve memory.

Bob: What’s the clinic called?

Billy: UmI can’t remember. Wait, what’s that red flower with thorns called?

Bob: Rose?

Billy turns to his wife.

Billy: Rose, what’s the name of my memory clinic?