Rafia Afi, 31, from Kerala’s Malappuram, has embarked on a unique mission. She helps create a safe, non-judgemental and liberating space for divorced women to heal and find joy again.
Nine months ago, Rafia’s eight-year-old marriage ended in a divorce. Families and friends rallied around her to help the single mother navigate the challenging period.
The experience offered her an insight into the privilege she enjoyed and others like her lacked — a solid support system.
The realisation drove her to launch Break Free Stories, a two-day travel retreat camp for women to celebrate being single after a murky divorce process.
Currently, Rafia is holding her fourth camp in Dubai after organising it in Vagamon, Alappuzha and Kakkadampoyil in Kerala.
After completing her postgraduation in physics from the University of Hyderabad, Rafia used to help her father, Abubaker Kadakulath, in his surveillance camera business.
She got married to her boyfriend, but the marriage fell apart eight years later when the couple realised they were incompatible.
She told The Telegraph that her ex-husband was a good human being, but they were like “halwa and sardine”, a total mismatch.
“Whoever you are or whatever you do, society is going to judge you based on your failed relationship. That’s really painful. It’s a very serious and complicated topic... society has branded it (divorce)
as taboo.
“I realised that some women were staying in unhappy marriages because they were afraid to take the plunge. A woman needs to come up with a convincing reason for a divorce so that society approves of it. There’s no safe space for a divorcee. This led me to launch a platform for women to heal and find hope for a bright future,” Rafia said.
Rafia connected with women like her through her Instagram page @cook_eat_burn and started taking 20 women per batch to a two-day retreat at resorts. As her camps gained popularity, women in Dubai got in touch with her, urging her to organise a retreat there.
“I took up the invitation and am currently holding a divorce-healing camp in Dubai. I realised that some healings don’t require fixing. These women need a safe and non-judgemental space. Women should realise that a loveless relationship is not the end of the world,” Rafia said on Saturday in the middle of her first session.
After the camps in Kerala, several women participants said they had found a space where they could speak freely about their bottled-up emotions.
Rafia said the women who came in with mixed feelings to the camps went back with a free mind and new friends.
This is not the first time that Rafia created a community exclusively for women. She had also launched Football for Her, a platform for those who identify as female or non-binary to play football. It saw women in headscarves coming out to play.
Rafia now wants to expand Break Free Stories across the country and beyond. She is preparing a strategy to make participation in the camps affordable for women from all walks of life.