Two donkeys saw zebras for the first time.
First donkey: Hey, they look like us but are dressed differently.
Second donkey: They must have run away from the prison.
Customer: I want my money back.
Shopkeeper: Whats the problem, sir?
Customer: I bought some bird seeds from here and they are no good.
Shopkeeper: Why? Wouldnt the birds eat them?
Customer: Birds? I planted each of those seeds and not a single bird grew out of them!
Gaurav: Why are you standing in front of the mirror with your eyes closed?
Naseer: Im trying to see how I look when I sleep.
Question: Where are nurses treated?
Answer: At nursery schools, of course.
Mother: Its so cold today! Where is your sweater?
Mary: Its in my bag, mother.
Mother: Why is it there?
Mary: Because my bag was feeling cold.
Tenant: The roof is leaking and my flat is flooded! How long will this go on?
Landlord: How am I supposed to know? Im not a weatherman.
Father: How do you like your new class teacher?
Ravi: She wasnt nice to me.
Father: What did she do?
Ravi: She asked me to sit in the front row for the present, but she never gave me one!
Mani: What has four legs, is green and fuzzy and will kill you if it falls on you off a tree?
Priya: A pool table.
First woman: Ive lost a lot of weight.
Second woman: I dont see it.
First woman: Thats because I have lost it.
A baby elephant and ant were playing one day.
Baby elephant: My mother is coming. I have to hide.
Ant: Why? Are you scared of her?
Baby elephant: I will explain later.
Ant: Okay, hide behind me, quick!
Kaveri: How are your grades?
Kaveri: What do you mean?
Akshay: Below C level, basically.
Mother: I asked you to notice when the soup boiled over.
Jaya: I did. Exactly at five clock.
A 60-year-old man bought a digital camera and couldnt figure out how to use it. So he called customer care. After 30 minutes, he still could not understand.
Man: Tell me step-by-step as you would teach a four-year-old.
Customer care executive: In that case, hand the phone to your mother.
Question: What is an astronauts favourite part of the computer?
Answer: The space bar.
Judge: Tell me why you broke the lock.
Thief: Simple, your honour. I didnt find the key.