Sudeep: Take my bag home. I want to play football.
Ashutosh: Its too heavy. I cant carry it such a long way.
Sudeep: You must take the bag or I wont help you with your homework.
When Sudeep comes home, he finds that all his books are missing.
Sudeep: Where are my books?
Ashutosh: You told me to bring your bag. You never mentioned the books.
Abhinandan Roul, Class V, S.C.B. Medical Public School, Cuttack, Orissa
Laboni: Suman, why are you hitting Raghav?
Suman: He called me a hippopotamus last month.
Laboni: Then why are you hitting him after all this time?
Suman: Because I went to the zoo yesterday and saw a hippopotamus for the first time!
Kakoli: When is the weather intolerable for rats?
Shyamoshree: Whenever its raining cats and dogs.
Purnima: What is our maths teachers favourite dessert?
Anuradha: A Pi!
Dipshikha: Mom, today I learnt how to make the impossible possible.
Dipshikha: By removing the first two letters.
Passenger: Bangalore has come! Bangalore has come!
Airhostess: Be silent.
Passenger: Angalore has come! Angalore has come!
Rajashree: What happened to the chicken who behaved badly in school?
Arjun: He was eggs-pelled.
Teacher: What do you call the outer part of a trees trunk?
Gauri: I dont know, sir.
Teacher: Bark, just bark!
Student: Woof! Woof!
Man: Could you tell me the fastest way to reach the hospital?
Passerby: Of course! Just stand in the middle of this road during rush hour.
Harry: What starts with the letter P, ends with the letter E and has millions of letters?
Sanjay: Post office.
Man: Did any one of you lose a bundle of currency notes tied with a red rubber band?
Several people: Yes!
Man: Here. Take your rubber band.
Jatin: What did the frog order at McDonalds?
Soni: French flies and a diet croak.
Ramesh: I have caught a huge fish.
Kanishka: But its gone now.
Ramesh: What do you mean?
Kanishka: An eagle just swooped down and flew away with it.
Ramesh: Oh no! How will the eagle cook the fish? The recipe is with me!
Avik: Mom, will you please give me a stale roti for my birds?
Mother: Tomorrow; the rotis are all fresh today.
Question: Why did the boy tiptoe past the medicine cabinet?
Answer: He didnt want to wake the sleeping pills!