Control tower (to pilot): Please report your height and position.
Pilot: I am 5 ft 11 inches tall and I am in the cockpit.
Mainak Tarafdar, Class VIII, Calcutta Boys School, Calcutta
Beggar: Give this blind beggar a rupee.
Passerby: But you can see with one of your eyes.
Beggar: Then please give this beggar 50 paise.
Guneet Singh, Class V, St Xaviers Collegiate School, Calcutta
Rini: Does your watch tell the time?
Mini: No, it doesnt. You have to look at it.
Soni Hiranandani, Class V, St Josephs School, Calcutta
After teaching the chapter on gravity the teacher asked one of the the students,
Why does a mango fall to the ground instead of going up in the sky?
The student replied, Because theres nobody to eat the mango in the sky.
Varsha Mahato, Class VIII, Central Modern School, Calcutta
The students had been photographed and the teacher was trying to persuade them to buy a copy of the group photograph.
Teacher: Just think how nice it would be to look at it when youre grown up and say, Theres Pushpa, shes married or Shankar, an IAS officer....
Boy: And theres the teacher. Shes dead.
Raktotpal Gogoi, Class VII, Delhi Public School, Nazira, Assam
Doctor: Whats your problem?
Patient: I have a lot of difficulty in breathing.
Doctor: Ill stop it completely.
Pritam Pathak, Class VII, Army School, Barrackpore
Soldier: Sir, I cant fight for my country anymore.
Major: Why? Whats wrong?
Soldier: My distant vision is very poor. I wont be able to see the enemy.
Major: Dont worry. Ill send you as the leading man in the front line.
Rini Khan, Class IV, St Stephens School, Calcutta
First Man: Why are all these people running?
Second Man: This is a race, the winner will get the cup.
First man: Oh, then why are the others running?
Suman Dhar, Class VIII, Uttarpara Amarendra Vidyapith, West Bengal
Father: Why did you get such a low score in the test?
Son: Due to absence.
Father: Were you absent on the day of the test?
Son: No, but the boy who sits next to me was!
Rinita Saha, Class I, St Judes High School, Madhyamgram, West Bengal
Father: Dont touch the dogs tail. It may bite you.
Son: Father, have you ever seen a dogs tail biting anyone?
Trishila Roy, Class VI, Calcutta Girls School, Calcutta