John : I failed every subject except for algebra. Father: How did you keep from failing that?

John: I didn’t take the algebra exam.

Archisman Podder, Class VI, St Mary’s Orphanage and Day School, Dum Dum, Calcutta

Patient: How long can a person live without a brain?

Doctor: How old are you?

Aditi Shah, Class VI, St Thomas’ Girls’ School, Calcutta

An elephant and an ant were once riding a bike. There was an accident and the elephant was dead.

Question: But the ant was alive. How?

Answer: Because the ant was wearing a helmet!

Subhadeep Chottoraj, Class VI, Vivekananda Mission School, Joka

Teacher: ‘‘I am very beautiful.’’ Which tense is this?

Student: Naturally, it is the past tense.

Avaratanu Roy, Class VIII, St Joseph’s School, Bihar

Lawyer: Don’t you feel ashamed that you keep coming to the court so many times?

Criminal: I came to the court only four times, but you come here every day. So shouldn’t you feel more ashamed?

Subhamita Sengupta, Class VI, Vivekananda Mission School, Joka

One day a man went to a store that sold television sets. Man: Do you have a colour TV?

Shopkeeper: Yes, we do.

Man: Will you please give me the red one?

Udit Bandopadhyay, Class VI, Barrackpore Army School, Calcutta

Question: How do you make ‘seven’ even? Answer: By removing the ‘S’ from seven!

Pankaj Kumar Jain, Class VIII, Bidya Teestha Academy, Calcutta

Question: What game did Godzilla play with humans? Answer: Squash.

Sayak Prasad, Class VII, Delhi Public School, Siliguri

Father: Son, what would you like to be when you grow up?

Son: A veterinary doctor.

Father: Why?

Son: Because animals can’t complain of wrong treatment.

Kumaresh Halder, Class VIII, St Anthony’s School, Kurseong

Question: In which room can’t we enter?

Answer: Mushroom!

Indrani Chatterjee, Class III, Loreto Convent School, Asansol

Teacher: Students, what do you know about the people of 18th century?

Students: They are all in heaven now.

Mousumi Paul, Class VII, Swami Pranabananda Vidyapith, Calcutta