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Punch

Teacher: Raju, where were you born?

Raju: Vishakhapatnam.

Teacher: Spell it.

Raju: I just remembered that I was born in Puri.

Biswajit Paul, Class V, Tiljala High School, Calcutta

 

Tina: What do you call a large wave?

Ravi: Tsunami.

Tina: And what do you call a little wave?

Ravi: A microwave.

Oindrila Das, Class V, Loreto Day School, Bowbazar

 

Question: What do you call a cow during an earthquake?

Answer: Milkshake.

Abhijeet Mandal, Class VI, Belpahar English Medium School, Jharsuguda

 

Teacher: What do you call a person who keeps talking long after people have lost all interest?

Student: A teacher.

Suchetak Ghosh, Class VII, St Stephen’s School, Dum Dum

 

Teacher: Students, why are you shouting?

Students: We weren’t shouting, ma’am. We were just discussing.

Teacher: What were you discussing?

Students: The benefits of silence.

Subhamita Sengupta, Class V, Vivekananda Mission School, Calcutta

 

Patient: I came to see you last week about insomnia. But your advice hasn’t helped. I still can’t sleep.

Doctor: Did you count sheep like I asked you to?

Patient: Yes. I counted 10,456 sheep.

Doctor: And you still couldn’t sleep?

Patient: No. By the time I finished counting, it was time to wake up.

Subham Saha, Class VIII, Burnpur Riverside School, Asansol

 

Question: Why did Kamal keep his CD player in the fridge?

Answer: Because he wanted to listen to some cool music.

Chayan Deep Batra, Class III, St Augustine’s Day School, Calcutta

 

Policeman (to a drunkard): I would like you to accompany me to the police station.

Drunkard: Why? Aren’t you confident of making it to the police station on your own?

Raktotpal Gogoi, Class VII, Delhi Public School, Nazira

 

Questions: Who do cows wear bells?

Answer: Because their horns don’t work.

Akash Sharma, Class V, Sunrise English Medium School, Belur

 

Teacher: What is your father’s name? Answer in English.

Student: My father’s name is Butter Red Government.

Teacher: Is that a joke?

Student: No, sir. His name is Makhan Lal Sarkar.

Nilesh Agarwal, Class VIII, Shree Jain Vidyalaya, Calcutta

 

Ram: Our teacher is very religious.

Father: How can you tell?

Ram: Every time I can answer a question, she says, ‘‘My God!’’

Sunit Paul, Class VII, Don Bosco High School, Guwahati

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