A scene from Jism: Tall order?

New Delhi, Feb. 13: If catching Jism with your date is on your Valentine’s Day plans, be warned: watching sex on screen can leave men depressed than inspired.

Many men compare their performance in bed with what they watch in explicit films, and end up suffering from performance anxiety, a report on the preliminary findings from TARSHI (Talking About Reproductive and Sexual Health Issues), a Delhi-based sexuality helpline, indicates.

It’s not only John Abraham’s six-pack abs that can make self-esteem in men plummet, claims of exploits by friends could do that, too.

Over the past 12 years it has been around, TARSHI’s helpline has responded to nearly 60,000 calls. The stereotype of sex being high on the male mind may not be terribly off the mark; more men worry about sex and sex worries them more.

Over 80 per cent of TARSHI’s callers are men and 38.76 of them seek general information on sexuality. Day-to-day sex-related problems account for 23.63 per cent of the calls.

Women, on the other hand, are more worried about issues like contraception and how sex impacts relationships. Over 22 per cent of female callers worry about birth control, while 21.44 per cent want plain relationship advice.

The helpline — open three days a week — is free, confidential, guarantees anonymity and is available in Hindi and English.

Its counsellors are instructed to be non-judgmental and their brief is to provide accurate basic information about sexuality, often tough to secure in a prudish society.

Singletons are not the only ones with sexual insecurities, 42.87 per cent of those who call are married. The helpline is accessed by people between the ages of 10 and 76; two-thirds of those who reach out are less than 30.

The report comments on the general lack of information on sexuality. Most callers, for instance, believe that condoms reduce pleasure and that oral sex can lead to pregnancy.

“The information that people have is usually incomplete or inaccurate as the sources of sexuality information seem to be blue films, misinformed friends or, more recently, Internet sites,” the report said.

So if your Valentine’s Day agenda goes beyond roses and chocolates, you might want to give TARSHI’s counsellors a call. They’re at 011-24372229.

It is not toll free, but then neither are sexual inadequacies.