Vijay and Nirmal were taking a walk in the fields...

Vijay: My father made such a scarecrow last year that not a single sparrow flew into our field.

Nirmal: That's nothing. My father built such a scarecrow that the frightened sparrows brought back all the grain they had taken last year.

Ttiyasa Daw, Class VI, Sri Aurobindo Institute of Education, Calcutta

A boy went to the barber to get a haircut. After some time... Barber: So how did your exams go?

Boy: They went fine. But why do you ask me this question whenever I come to your shop?

Barber: When I ask you about your exams your hair stands on end and it's easier to cut it.

Chittaranjan Deka, Class VIII, Assam Jatiya Vidyalaya, Guwahati, Assam

Iman's class was studying metric conversions.

Teacher: So tell me, Iman, how many feet are there in a yard?

Iman: Umm... it depends on how many people are standing in it.

Aanant Goyal, Class VII, B.G. Kendriya Vidyalaya, Calcutta

Mr Mitra: What did you buy ?

Mrs Mitra: Clothes for Raj and Mohan, bangles for myself and a sari for our servant.

Mr Mitra: What did you get for me?

Mrs Mitra: A bill of Rs 5,000.

Akash agarwal, Class IV, Welland Gouldsmith School, Calcutta

Fortune teller: Your prospects are not very good. I can see a man standing in your way. Client: God help him then. I drive a steam-roller.

Shambaditya Das, Class VIII, The St Xavier's School, Malda, West Bengal

Q: Who is a doctor?

A: A person who cures with his pills but kills with his bills.

Ekagra Halder, Class VI, M.H.M.S, Calcutta

Pradip: Is ink very expensive, dad?

Father: Not at all, son. But why do you ask this?

Pradip: Well, mom scolded me a lot when I spilled some on the new silk bedsheet.

Unnat Jain, Class VII, Shree Bharati, Calcutta

Q: What's the time when an elephant sits on a chair?

A: It's time to buy a new chair!

Salonee Goel, Class VI, St James School, Binnaguri, West Bengal

Old man: Do you have anything for grey hair?

Chemist: Oh, yes. Ample respect.

Kushagra Tiwary, Class VIII, Don Bosco School, Bandel, West Bengal

Doctor: How are you keeping now?

Patient: Not too well.

Doctor: But aren't you taking two spoons of the medicine I have prescribed?

Patient: But I have only one spoon in the house.

Pritom Roy, Class VI, Loyola High School, Calcutta

Q: When does your hand blush?

A: When you're caught red-handed.

Ryan S. Kaiser, Class VII, La Martiniere for Boys, Calcutta